Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    exquisite's Avatar
    exquisite Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 15, 2007, 07:15 PM
    Makes me feel I am so boring
    Hey all, I met up with my boyfriend today who is always willing to have sex with me but never willing to respond to my mails, texts or whatever. He does that when he wants to... so today when I asked him why he never responds... he said" hey listen stop cribbing....i've become so indifferent to your mails and questions about why I am not responding that now I actually don't respond....I love to talk about lot of things but you're always asking why I don't write/respond"... this surprised me as I talk a lot about other things but asking him why he doesn't respond puts him off... he made me feel I am so boring but said he felt connection. What kind of a connection is this, when he doesn't even like talking to me but wants to make out... am I wrong in thinking this way? Really low on self esteem today... can anyone tell me what I should do? It's so depressing...
    AW805's Avatar
    AW805 Posts: 283, Reputation: 43
    Full Member
     
    #2

    May 15, 2007, 08:00 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by exquisite
    What kind of a connection is this, when he doesn't even like talking to me but wants to make out....am I wrong in thinking this way? Really low on self esteem today...can anyone tell me what I should do? It's so depressing....
    ... He just wants a sex connection. But I think you already know that.
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    May 15, 2007, 08:10 PM
    Agrees on the sex connection. When you stop the sex, then see what you have with this guy. But I think you already know what you have outside the bedroom - nothing.

    Get smart and make decisions for the betterment of your own self esteem and respect.
    gypsy456's Avatar
    gypsy456 Posts: 319, Reputation: 48
    Full Member
     
    #4

    May 15, 2007, 08:57 PM
    You chose the name "exquisite" for this Forum.

    Make sure people treat you like that... with the respect you deserve.

    Good luck.
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    May 15, 2007, 09:19 PM
    Mmm move on-you deserve better.

    He just wants sex-no relationship. Connection-as he uses it, means sex-that's it nothing else.

    Sorry.

    Cheers.
    yathink103's Avatar
    yathink103 Posts: 27, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #6

    May 15, 2007, 09:28 PM
    Move on
    exquisite's Avatar
    exquisite Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #7

    May 16, 2007, 03:44 AM
    So should I tell him that I feel disrespected and then move on... or write a mail telling him so... please suggest
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
    Uber Member
     
    #8

    May 16, 2007, 04:47 AM
    I know email is a current trend in writing those move on letters, but it sounds tacky to use that method. If it is THE only way you can communicate to him, without feeling pressured from him to continue the sex, then use email. Otherwise, a good face to face telling him to leave you alone is the best way. There can be no uncertain terms or meanings when you look in his eyes and tell him to get lost.

    Which ever way you choose, best of luck to you.
    diya's Avatar
    diya Posts: 303, Reputation: 62
    Full Member
     
    #9

    May 16, 2007, 07:40 AM
    Looks like this guy has lost all respect for you and though he knows you're there, he's good at controlling you too. Doesn't care how you'd feel and just wants that you do what he wants you to do... I want to ask you... if another being cannot respect you as a person, how will respect your body... I woudn't find it mentally stimulating at all and sex is all about mental stimulation... isn't it? Back off for a few days and earn respect... then go ahead if you wish to... if he doesn't realize... too bad... then sure he's a neurotic...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #10

    May 16, 2007, 07:51 AM
    Dump this loser he is using you just for sex, and you deserve better don't you think?
    LesaRyan04's Avatar
    LesaRyan04 Posts: 29, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #11

    May 16, 2007, 07:57 AM
    He just wants to respond to you in the bedroom. Mmhmm...
    AW805's Avatar
    AW805 Posts: 283, Reputation: 43
    Full Member
     
    #12

    May 16, 2007, 08:10 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    Dump this loser he is using you just for sex, and you deserve better don't you think?
    Talaniman: You want to know how she knows the answer? Read her other posts. Same questions -- same answers.
    gypsy456's Avatar
    gypsy456 Posts: 319, Reputation: 48
    Full Member
     
    #13

    May 16, 2007, 09:04 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by exquisite
    So should I tell him that I feel disrespected and then move on...or write a mail telling him so...please suggest

    Don't break up with people by sending emails or text messages.
    It's not respectful.
    No matter what your feelings may be.
    Keep your standards high.
    In situations like this an email or text message is not classy.

    Good luck
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #14

    May 16, 2007, 12:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by AW805
    Talaniman: You want to know how she knows the answer? Read her other posts. Same questions -- same answers.
    I need a break, I answered all her other posts with pretty much the same advice. Thanks for the wake up call AW.:eek:
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
    Ultra Member
     
    #15

    May 16, 2007, 01:48 PM
    AW, T-Man, everyone else on these posts and especially YOU Exquisite.

    I have read through all of Exquisite's posts. Honey, this guy only wants sex from you because you are MARRIED! You have quite effectively left that little piece of info out of your posts, except the immigration question you posted that I found.

    I am hazarding a guess that he is married as well, and my dear, you are breaking the rules of the extramarital affair etiquette by demanding more than a slap and tickle romp. Stop tormenting the guy already. Stop asking him for more of his time. He doesn't have it to give. He doesn't want to spend any more time with you than he already is. He doesn't want to text message or e-mail you all day long. He just wants you to be available when he can steal some time and get away for some afternoon delight. He is looking for a piece on the side, nothing more. That is what you are to him. That is why the guy never tried chasing you when you first broke up with him. He doesn't give a dam(sp). If you are available for some sex, fine. If you aren't, fine. That is what is going through his mind.

    What the heck are you looking for? Are you going to divorce your husband for this guy? Start concentrating on your husband or get a freakin' divorce. But, whatever you do, stop driving everyone here nuts with the same questions over and over again. Your BF is not willing to give you any more of his time than he is already giving. End of story. So, make a decision on what you want to do about it and stop asking these silly teenage questions, over and over again. Sheesh!
    diya's Avatar
    diya Posts: 303, Reputation: 62
    Full Member
     
    #16

    May 16, 2007, 04:24 PM
    In any given situation, if mind is unsettled, stop for awhile and think... do you really have to stoop so low to lose all your dignity? Pay heed to the above posts and act wisely.
    exquisite's Avatar
    exquisite Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #17

    Jun 15, 2007, 11:40 AM
    Thank you all... there was actually no relationship outside the bedroom and all your advises proved so very true. The moment I said no to sex, he disappeared from the scene.
    abbadabbadoo's Avatar
    abbadabbadoo Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #18

    Oct 5, 2011, 11:56 AM
    Move on girl, but you ask whether you should write or tell him face to face that he doesn't respect you? Don't bother telling him! He already knows how he feels, and he will probably just try to manipulate you again if you do! Remember when he said that it was all your fault that he doesn't reply to your messages because you are turning him off..? Classic manipulation, girlfriend, he completely put you where he wanted you - you started a conversation about his behaviour, but he flipped it all around leaving you confused and feeling guilty, while he didn't have to take responsibility for his actions. Do you really want that again? There is no hope for this "relationship". Just move on - don't reply to messages or calls, especially not booty calls! He probably won't even notice - guaranteed he's got other women he's stringing along for sex, too. If he does say something (when one of these other women aren't giving him what he wants), just smile and say you don't know what he's talking about. You've every right to move on and you don't owe him an explanation for anything.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

Handcuffed by Boring Job [ 10 Answers ]

I am at another one of those proverbial crossroads in my life. I'm in my early 30's, have a law degee (with almost $100,000 of debt), and have a 1 yr. old son. I spend my days at a job (non legal) that pays just enough to live on. I do not want to sit in a cubicle my whole life. But since I...

Boring Project Management What to do? [ 2 Answers ]

Hi, I had varied work experience of about 10 years in IT field starting with AS/400, Java, Oracle and certified in Oracle developer. My recent past eaperience is in to Web Tech, ASP/PHP not much but a little of DOTNET.All the way through I had been a very good developer and Tech guy with awards....

He makes me feel guilty when I ask for a divorce [ 3 Answers ]

I have been married for 26 years. I got married when right after turning 18 and got out of high school. He always worked nights and I worked days. We have never went on vacation and he has always went fishing with his fiends every year on our anniversary. I feel I missed out on life and need to...

Hair color mistake that makes me truly feel like a blonde [ 1 Answers ]

Hi, Im sure you know now... Im a blonde and I have made a bad mistake to my hair color! I did it for a Halloween party this past Saturday night. My hair is blonde w/ strong blonde highlights. I decided I was going to this costume party as a gothic prom queen. So I sprayed black hairspray in my...

Boring flight (What to do?) [ 1 Answers ]

What are some fun, sensible things to do on a long flight? (fun thing to do for a sensible grown up... i.e - not childish or immature)


View more questions Search