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    Sidious116's Avatar
    Sidious116 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 17, 2013, 04:35 PM
    Am I dumb for holding on to false hope?
    I've been with my ex fiancé for going on four years on August 1st. She broke up with me one week before our anniversary. After the break up we talked and my step son who's 5 still calls me and sees me as his father. He gets very excited when he sees me. My ex and I have been intimate since the break up with each other and still talk about life like we are still together and really we act like a couple when we see each other. We've lived together for 3 of the four years.

    In May I lost the house I was renting because she lost her job in January, and since May everything just went down hill from there. When we talk I tell that her I miss my partner, but her response to me is she has to take care of her family (her son). I miss them both, last week I take all 3 of us to hotel to spend the weekend. While packing up she mention that she wants to move back in with me and wants to officially get married. The ring I bought her in February ending up in the pawn shop in March.

    Any way this past Monday she started working again, she didn't call, Wednesday I called and expressed my disappointment, she got mad at me and hung up. I don't want to let her go but nothing I can do, am I wrong for still having hope?

    PS, her friends and family tell her there are better fish in the sea, she used to tell me when we saw each other. But she told she'll let me know if or when she starts dating again, I said the same back.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Aug 17, 2013, 05:49 PM
    I think she was tired of the financial problems that couldn't pay the rent and lost her a ring too. I think I would leave her alone for a while and focus on getting your financial house in order, because bad finances are the number one cause of divorces. 4 years then I would treat this as a divorce.

    No you are not a fool because your hope may be false, most go through the same thing after a break up, but for sure know for fact that for now, you are on your own. Sorry guy but it may take a while to accept that. You are hardly a fool, just hurt.
    Sidious116's Avatar
    Sidious116 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Aug 17, 2013, 06:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    I think she was tired of the financial problems that couldn't pay the rent and lost her a ring too. I think I would leave her alone for a while and focus on getting your financial house in order, because bad finances are the number one cause of divorces. 4 years then I would treat this as a divorce.

    No you are not a fool because your hope may be false, most go thru the same thing after a break up, but for sure know for fact that for now, you are on your own. Sorry guy but it may take a while to accept that. You are hardly a fool, just hurt.

    She pawned the 3000 dollar ring to pay for her that she was behind on. And I get my new place in October. But I just hate not having them around any, more worst part is my stepson still loves me and I him, but I can't see him.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Aug 17, 2013, 06:16 PM
    That something to discuss with her if you can be a good (step) father, but I doubt she goes for it given the circumstances and then there would be visitations and child support responsibility. I doubt she goes for any of that so just make the best for yourself.

    Give this some time to let the emotional dust settle guy and keep it real for yourself. Takes a while as I said before.

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