[ANGEL SCHOCKO]

I've been with the same man for 5 years. He does get over friendly when we're out in public. He tries to reassure me I'm all he wants, but I can't get it threw my head! I have no proof that he's ever cheated, but his ex wife calls and they argue like they're still married. I told him he has no reason to even speak to her because the kids are old enough to call him themselves.

When I first met him he took me to meet his girls, but we went to his ex mother in laws house and it was very uncomfortable! I told him I didn't want to be put in that situation again, and then to top that off, the ex, posted a picture on Facebook with all her baby's daddy's in her house visiting their kids, and someone commented, how Sid uh manage that? Her response was, I got it like that! I don't know what to do! - FRUSTRATED.

[talaniman]

Stay out of their business and stay off her Facebook, and don't allow your boyfriend to drag you in this mess in any way or fashion.

That's why they are not together, they never got along in the first place. Its always like this with an ex baby mama, or daddy, conflicts popup, and the way you handle it is stay separate from the situation, and give him space when he is angry or frustrated. Or else you feel what he feels, FRUSTRATED.

Some ex's are better than others and you seem to have a bad one plus you have your own issues (Jealousy?) also, that YOU need to handle. Think before you ACT, or SPEAK, until you have your own feelings under control and can deal with your resentment that you have for the ex, and get over the suspicions of him cheating.

After 5 years you should have more trust and faith in yourself, him, and the relationship unless there are other things besides the ex baby mama you are worried about.

[Homegirl 50]

The man has kids with this lady and he will always talk to her for one reason or another. When you date a man with kids, this is what you get. I am divorced and my daughter is over 30 and my ex and I still have conversations about her. We don't argue though.

You have been putting up with this for 5 years. It is not going to change, so you either learn to ignore it or leave. It's not the ex, it is what your boyfriend allows. You either trust him or you don't. Personally I would not stay with a man I don't trust and certainly not for that long. 5 years, is your relationship not going anywhere? Maybe this is why you are feeling so jealous.

[N0help4u]

My guy is like that. He had a couple ex''s and a bunch of female friends. After a while he dropped the one ex and rarely talks to the female friends any more, but is still friends with his grown kids mom. You either accept his baggage or leave him. You can't change him. If you hadn't made it clear you do not feel uncomfortable with his past life family maybe he would feel more comfortable in including you going to visit, then you'd know more of what he is up to. If you are uncertain about if he is cheating or not all you really can do is learn his patterns and notice if there are times that he can't account for where he's been. Learn to listen to your gut as to whether he is lying or not. I have learned to listen to my gut to the point that I can tell him where he was and what he was doing before he tells me.

[joypulv]

People come as a package. Some of it you like, some you don't. You accept it or leave it, if a little heart to heart serious talk doesn't produce any changes.

(You are being unreasonable about talking to the ex. There's a lot more to raising children than talking to them on the phone!)

Your title is 'I hate my jealousy.' Good first step! You can work on jealousy. We all have it in varying degrees, but if we are smart, we keep a lid on it for the sake of the relationship, whether it's a best friend who is cuter than you, or the neighbor with the nicer flowers, or your boyfriend who is super outgoing and gregarious. We do it to KEEP those people and not lose them. Right? It means work. Consider it a school course and call it Jealousy 101 and write down when it happens, and what you will force yourself to re-think in order to make it go away.

[N0help4u]

Exactly, you can not act on your jealousy without proof positive evidence, otherwise keep the lid on and accept the baggage.