[gamma jj]

Last August my three daughters and I planned our annual trip to branson for a special week of bonding. Our oldest daughter always breaks the rules and lets her husband come up even though none of the rest of our men come, This year my husband told our daughter under no circumstances would he be allowed to come due to his physical and verbal abuse of Angie. There are too many examples to include but the abuse has been physical and lots of cursing, namecalling and such. She has told us for two years how unhappy she has been but she has three kids and dies not want to raise them alone. Long story short, he shows up and she asks me to talk to him, My first mistake,, I ask him calmly what part of mother daughter week don't you understand. He screams at me "mind your own ing business in front of my daughters and grandchildren. He proceeds to call me a ing . Texts me after and tells me don't you ever speak to me again you crazy sick old woman. Well, we told our aughter he was no longer allowed at our home or lake place until an apology is received. They have done marriage counseling and have separated but are back together. He told my daughter he will never apologize. We have never had a cross word in 20 years but our family has never really cared for him and he really doesn't care for us it turns out. Seven months later Angie nor scott have apologized. Needless to say, I am very disappointed and hurt and angry. I have continued to see my daughter and grandkids but we have not seen him nor do I wish to, What should I do?

[Wondergirl]

Angie doesn't want to raise the children alone? I am guessing he isn't much help, except for a paycheck, maybe. And she really wants her children hearing that potty mouth? (If he cusses you out, he probably doesn't hold back at other times when things don't go his way.) It's going to come down to Angie realizing she needs to give her children (and herself) a better emotional life. If they divorce, he will still be required to pay support, or do they currently have a wonderful lifestyle she can't bear to part with?

[Fr_Chuck]

You are really lucky he did not physcially hurt you, but you don't talk to him and ignore him.
If he is physically abusive to wife, you try very hard to make her live him for her safety and for mental health of the kids, kids that grow up in homes like that, repeat the cycle theirself

[joypulv]

I'm not sure what you are hoping to hear. You have said your piece to him, and he has said his, and you are at an impasse. It doesn't sound like he plans to apologize. So you continue on as is. At least your daughter is willing to see you.

I am puzzled by 2 things:
If this is strictly a mother-daughter event, why is your husband ordering anyone not to go?
Why are you waiting for an apology from your daughter; for what? It doesn't sound like she was able to keep him from going.

[JudyKayTee]

I'm the Queen of Confrontation - and this opening line seems confrontational to me!

"I ask him calmly what part of mother daughter week don't you understand."