[xtreme3xo]

In September 2012 Me and my girlfriend of 3 and a half years went on holiday and we had sex, 6 months later me and my girlfriend have not had sex since. During this time she has shunned all my attempts of being close with her.

I truly love my girlfriend and find her the most amazing person in the world and I treat her as well as I can everyday and I don't ever feel get this in return but I put up with this because I love her.

We both go to Uni and she has 3 jobs now that means I rarely see her as much as I used to and she is always busy and doesn't always have time for me.

Recently though I have been asking is this relationship what she wants and she says "Yes" she wouldn't be in it if she didn't want to be, the sad thing is she hasn't said she loves me since Christmas Day and more and more I feel as though I'm going through a losing battle.

I mean I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong like most men I try hard on what I wear and maybe I could go the gym but I'm not big or anything like that I just feel rejected as a person as though I'm not good enough for her any more.

I keep bringing this up but she keeps saying I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill and I keep saying this stuff to her because she thinks I want her to break up with me.

Truth is I love her and I don't want to break up with her I've been as romantic as I can be I mean I buy her roses spontaneously and will always show her love and affection and will back off when she needs space but in reality all it feels like in our relationship is that is all it is "Space".

I love her to pieces but how can I say I want to spend the rest of my life with a person who can't say they love me. If I break up with her it feels as though 4 years of my life has been wasted on a pipe dream of pure bliss.

I just need someone to tell me that this is going to work itself out because I genuinely don't think we will ever be the same.

[talaniman]

Why is she working 3 jobs. She has no time for a relationship, nor does she do the things she has to keep you reassured. Maybe that's the way she is, I don't know, but this sounds like a Long Distance relationship, and clearly you are not the priority. So how long is this 3 job thing supposed to last?

Something lse is going on here. What is it?

[xtreme3xo]

We live like 20 minutes away from one another so as you can see its not a great feeling. Well she's a fitness instructor a sales assistant and she is doing a placement as a PE teacher at a high school as well. Her placement ends in 2 weeks but the problems started before then.

I don't know just feels as though even though I'm not a priority any more I just feel like I'm just being left behind.

I genuinely can not complain with what you have just said it makes fantastic sense and just reading makes me up beat and ready to work on the relationship but realise if the relationship is going to work I've got to take more of a step back.

Just feels like after 6 months of no kissing holding each other or anything like that it just makes me kind of feel like I don't know not necessarily unimportant but just helpless because I do try.

[talaniman]

Workaholics are no fun, and you are right. You aren't a priority.

[xtreme3xo]

What do you feel I should do?

[talaniman]

I would re evaluate my commitment, be friends, and explore and experiment in my own world. The time for a relationship you want with this female doesn't appear to be working for whatever reason, so major modifications are indicated.

This is to one sided for my taste and I doubt if anything changes enough to make a difference. These kinds of problems in the first 6 months to a year are solvable if both party's are willing, and clearly she is not, so what's the point of continuing down this path?

You can love someone deeply all you want, shower them with flowers and candy, but if it not reciprocated back in some form or fashion, it's a total waste of time, NO FUN at all and a change in direction however hard emotionally may be the best thing for the long run.

That would be my assessment any way. Read my signature below. You have a decision to make. Never give your heart to someone that doesn't appreciate it, or know what to do with it, so take it back, and protect it.