[Lm12griffith]

Hi, me and my ex have known each other for 3 years.. like really known each other but I've kind of known him since I was a little kid... like diapers kind of little kid.. we used to play together when we were little and his cousin was my best friend for years. He broke up with me because we were fighting too much,and he needed space. (his words) He talked me me every couple days after the breakup saying he missed me, and other stuff and wanted to be friends until we got our lives in order so then we could get back together. Then never did anything about it. Finally I confronted him face to face, we talked things out. Apparently he had gotten a new job,and his best friend moved in with him. We both agreed that we needed to solve the problems the relationship had,and start from scratch before we could get back together. He wanted me to secretly be with him but not tell his family because his family was having Major problems ,and it would only add fuel to the fire,and I refused to do that. Then I said we could date, start over,and when we got serious again, we would then tell his family. However, we kept talking and He kept hugging me,and kissing me and tickling me one thing led to another and we ended up sleeping together. Afterwords I cried because I was scared that I would loose him,and that I couldn't be with him, and told him this. That I had been crying myself to sleep every night,and that I didn't know if I could handle being friends, and he held me and said "no matter if we stay friends or are together, I'll never loose him because he loves me. That we have more of a chance of getting back together then not and he knew how hard it was on me, because it was hard on him, that it was the only way we'd have a real chance." I said that it would be easier just to let each other go if he didn't want to be with me, and he practically refused to not have me in his life. He says that every time he thinks of me witch is almost all the time that he hates himself for being such an ,and that he doesn't want to loose me because he thinks if he ever had any chance,real chance of actually staying with someone, and marrying them it's me because I am the exception to all his rules... I looked him dead in the face, and asked if he was in love with me,and he told me yes, he was just a little scared because all of his previous relationships he had been hurt. He says he wants to be best friends until we get our lives in order, and now expects us to talk/text everyday, and to hangout once or twice a week,and for me to come to him for all my problems and him to come to me. However, if he comes to not want me where does that leave me? I'll never get over him,and I'm really confused on what he wants? Is he really being direct with me or just playing games. Please respond, and thank you for all your help.