[DW007]

Ok, Hi folks, hope ye can help me? I've been with my girlfriend for nearly 6 months, I'm 29 and she is 28. At the start everything was great and "new" but I've felt that the last few weeks there has been NO intimacy at all. She was in hospital having an operation nearly 3 months ago and when she came out that's when everything seemed to change, the last time we had sex (on my birthday, start of August!? ) was terrible and she complained of been tender so we stopped?! We live just over an hour away from each other so only get to see each other 2-3 a week if I'm lucky! The thing is, we would try see each other most nights when we were first dating and now I seem to be the one trying to make the plans for both of us. I understand she can get busy at work and have long days, but I'm the same, and still would make time to see her if she wanted me to. I've asked her about this before and all she said is that it was natural for relationships to feel more comfortable, I know/understand this completely, but after so long I'm wondering if the attraction is not there for her any more. We say we love each other (I tell her more than she says it to me). I would have thought, only seeing each other twice weekly and with her saying the relationship is more natural, she would like to be closer when we meet. We both live at home, I care for a family member and she lives with her parents but we do try to get away for weekends even for a night. I have a high sex drive and would love her to be more spontaneous and have us make love at the end of a night out somewhere quiet, add/get back a bit of the fire to the relationship. Am I been unreasonable??

[Fr_Chuck]

You both live with your families, nothing is going to happen spur of the moment, if it is not planned please get over it. What was her medical issue? Was or is there still an issue with being tender during sex perhaps?

Are you being too pushy for sex all the time, can make her feel used if that is all you talk about.

[DW007]

No I'm not pushy about it at all, I only asked her the once since how she felt about the relationship and that I felt we needed to get the spark back. Her medical issue was to do with cysts on her bladder, thankfully she is well healed. Am I worrying about nothing. I really do love her and maybe I think like this because this is the longest time I have not been intimate with my partner in any relationship I had prior!!

[Fr_Chuck]

Never been married huh? Sort of a joke and then not. Expect months sometimes for all sorts of reasons. That is a standing joke on why guys learn to masterbate early in life, since they will need to know how after they are married.