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    dem06's Avatar
    dem06 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 23, 2012, 12:49 PM
    Should I leave my husband for my lover of 15 years?
    I have been having an affair with my lover for 15 years. I'm married and have been for 6 years. He was married when the affair started but divorced his wife 2 years ago. I love my husband because he takes care of me and my teenaged daughter. I am in love with my lover and can't imagine him not being in my life. I want and feel that I need to know whether things would work out between my lover and I. I often think about leaving my husband because I'm cheating on him and we both deserve to be in happy and healthy relationships. It just seems that I should not be with my husband because I've cheated and am in love with another man. My husband would never ever forgive me if he knew. I just don't know what to do. I want to make things right and live an honest and happy life. What should I do?
    Unkown629's Avatar
    Unkown629 Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
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    #2

    Jul 23, 2012, 01:09 PM
    I think if your affair has been going on for 15 years then it proves that he will be there for you and your daughter. At the same time if you can't imagine your life without your lover and not your husband... that only proves that you belong with your lover. But also think about the fact that he cheated on his wife for you and he might cheat on you for someone else if you guys do end up together. If you do want to stay with your husband you should rail yourself out of you and your lovers relationship so the break up wouldn't be as devastating. Hope I helped!
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #3

    Jul 23, 2012, 01:15 PM
    Let your poor husband go. You've never been faithful to him, and you never should have married him to begin with. All he is to you is a safety net, someone to take care of you while you have sex with someone else. That's not fair to him.

    You're only thinking about yourself. Think about the man you married for a change. If the lover isn't willing to take care of you and your daughter, maybe it's time that you learn to take care of yourself and stop relying on men to do it for you.
    bigNavySeal's Avatar
    bigNavySeal Posts: 106, Reputation: 19
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    #4

    Jul 24, 2012, 02:40 AM
    Sorry, I don't understand how you can be with your lover for 15 years but married someone else down the line, 9 years after you met your lover! This doesn't make sense to me. Shouldn't you have married your lover?
    JumpFrog's Avatar
    JumpFrog Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jul 24, 2012, 03:15 AM
    Yes, that doesn't make sense. You are really cruel if you married one man while not being faithful to him to begin with. Think about your husband. Dump the lover, who didn't want to marry you. The poster Alty has it spot on. Also, just HOW and WHY did you marry one man while loving another? I need to know the situation before I can make any assumptions about your character, which I already did...

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