[Seelein]

I recently met a guy on an online dating site and we have been seeing each other every few days for about a month. He is very much an ideal partner for me. He is artistic, stylish, handsome and somehow can't take his eyes of me. Not everything has run a smooth course, we have had a rocky start on basically all of our firsts. When we met and started initial conversations it was a little awkward. Our first kiss was disastrous and the first time we had sex was very bizarre as well.
Most of the awkwardness has cleared itself up.
My problem is: after a very nice date last night we ended up back at his place, this morning we woke up and as he made me breakfast we got to talking about his art classes. (he takes nude drawing classes. His sketchbooks and walls are full of beautiful women, as well as many nudes.) I asked him if he wanted to draw me and he said yes but at the moment he'd rather kiss me. I asked him whether he ever became aroused in his classes and he said he didn't, but something in his look said otherwise so I pressed on. He then said he remembers the first time he met his friend "Lisa" (one of the nudes on his wall, the incredibly beautiful one- you could even say flawless)
He told me the story of how he was walking up a flight of stairs at school one day and as he reached the top steps she began to descend. He said his first glance of her simply took his breath away. The very next day he walked in to his figure drawing class and much to his delight the beautiful girl from the stairs was the model for the day. He described how excited he was to see her naked and that she was even more beautiful with her clothes off.
At this point I became very uncomfortable, so I tried to not show how upset I had suddenly become by pretending to look away at something else. He noticed and asked if I was mad. I told him I was frustrated and that I couldn't help but feel jealous of his unrequited love, especially as her image hung over us in bed. He explained that she lives half-way across the world now and that he was in a relationship at the time anyway. Somehow I could not regain my composure and I even started crying after explaining that it made me so upset mainly because it tapped into my insecurity of feeling unlovable. The mood was severely altered and we both became despondent. I suggested I leave an he insisted he drive me home. I apologized for becoming the green eyed moster but I'm worried that interaction might have severely damaged our new relationship. I'm also worried that this feeling of jealousy is rooted in something else. Is jealousy normal? Should I have this feeling?
Thank you for reading, any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[ali18ninja]

Actually jealousy is normal. A partner should feel a little jealous after hearing a story like that. It just shows how much you care and want to be loved. At the same time, it was in his past. That doesn't mean you shouldn't have felt jealous even a little. You obviously care a lot about him and you want him to care for you the same way. Don't feel bad for how you felt. Those are just your feelings. Just apologize and explain and ask if you two can move forward from this. If he's a good guy, it shouldn't be a problem.

[Nostalgia101]

Ummm yeah, I would say your reaction was more than normal. What he said was waaaay too much information for any woman to hear. Is he very young? Because it sounds like something an immature guy would do. Most seasoned men have learned what pisses women off and try to be respectful. My partner looks away from the TV if an attractive woman is undressing and then looks at me, and tells me how beautiful I am, or how much I turn him on. I have never behaved jealously or asked him to do such things. He just does it to prevent me from feeling any discomfort on his own accord.

I think the very fact that your boyfriend has naked women displayed over his bed should cause him to behave a LOT more sensitively. If anything he should reassure you that it's just art, and not tell you his stories of desire. Hope that helps!

-Alex