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antutin · Jun 27, 2012, 02:08 PM

I think she’s starting to like me the way I like her but deny it to me. It’s really hard because I just told her that I love her in a different way, and that I’m bisexual, but she said she’s not. I really love her and I’m very much attracted to her. Please I need some advice.

It’s my first time to feel like this with the same sex and I think she is too, but denying it because she’s older than me. I’m 32 and she’s in her 40's and we share a house with my 2 kids. She’s loving and kind and loves my kids so much.

crazyana10 · Jun 27, 2012, 04:09 PM

Well I think you should tell her . And ummnn... At night , you plan a secret date on the bed when the kids are asleep. It can be sexual.

odinn7 · Jun 27, 2012, 04:17 PM

Originally Posted by crazyana10

Well I think you should tell her . And ummnn... At night , you plan a secret date on the bed when the kids are asleep. It can be sexual.

Whew! Hold on there! Maybe I agree with the telling her bit of all of this but you would need to know how she feels before you go and plan a date on her bed. Imagine how awkward that could be if you go and do something like that and she freaks out.

To the OP... maybe just talk to her about it and try and get it all out in the open. If she doesn't go for it, then let it go. It can only cause problems if you keep trying to push it after she's said she isn't interested... and don't plan a date on her bed unless she is OK with it!

crazyana10 · Jun 27, 2012, 04:47 PM

Originally Posted by odinn7

Whew! Hold on there! Maybe I agree with the telling her bit of all of this but you would need to know how she feels before you go and plan a date on her bed. Imagine how awkward that could be if you go and do something like that and she freaks out.

To the OP....maybe just talk to her about it and try and get it all out in the open. If she doesn't go for it, then let it go. It can only cause problems if you keep trying to push it after she's said she isn't interested...and don't plan a date on her bed unless she is ok with it!

WELL that's what I meant . Talk to her first in like a dinner or something and than y'all can plan a date after IF SHE FEELS THE SAME WAY.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 27, 2012, 07:54 PM

If you are a women, and a lesbian, and she is straight, really straight, you will just ruin a great relationship doing anything.

A straight women will have no interest in you that way at all, no more than you could or would have interest in a man, If there was a man in the house and they told you they had feelings for you, could you become interested if you only liked women ? No of course not.

mearbhall · Jun 28, 2012, 01:11 PM

A lesbian/bisexual woman cannot seduce a straight woman. I'm sorry, but as a straight woman myself, I find this a little insulting; imagine if I asked advice on how to "turn" a gay man! Oh, and FYI, referring to somebody as "old" will never endear you to them.

joypulv · Jun 28, 2012, 01:23 PM

Yep, you've lost her already on the old part.
You have a good thing going with the house sharing and the kid loving situation. Why ruin it with sex? You have to know by now that sex ruins every living arrangement.

EvolLove88 · Jun 30, 2012, 11:36 AM

I'm a lesbian myself and in some cases I've been in your shoes and In one case I've been in hers. If I was you I would figure out everything that you want to say to her ( without repeating yourself or being pushy. Just get to the point) and let her know that you're intentions isn't to make her feel uncomfortable but that she has given you mixed signals whether it was intentional or not and give her the opportunity to tell you how she feels. I would wait a bit for " the talk" seems that this issue has already been driven into her and if she is straight then by now the only thing you have accomplished is having your friend/roommate very uncomfortable. I know how you feel though. I have been with several girls that claimed they were straight but I asked them once and that's what they told me so I went on. Even though they were being flirty and giving me signs I waited until they were comfortable enough to admit to themselves and me that this was how they feel. I have also been the one that was being pursued by another female that I was into more than words could explain but couldn't find it in myself to admit. Although I just wanted to shout it out at the rooftops it took me 8 months to tell her. So pretty much for right now and possibly forever her comfort zone with you is as your friend and nothing more.

talaniman · Jun 30, 2012, 12:27 PM

You have been rejected for romance and sex, and should take the hint and drop it and respect her for her decision. Go explore your new found feelings with some one who is willing but forget experimenting with some one that has already said She ain't into you like that.

Don't get so carried away by your own NEW intense feelings that you cross the lines of good behavior, and put your friend, and your kids in a bad, uncomfortable situation.

That would be selfish, foolish, and unwise. Control your urges, and lust!