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wanna smile · Feb 6, 2007, 10:28 PM

My hubby and I have been married for 20 years this year and we've always been happy until he had a career change! He is now nursing and is working with a lot of females, 4 years ago he was diagnosed with testicular cancer and had a testicle removed, things haven't been the same since,he is not at all interested in sex or in me at all for that matter,He has been to the doctors and has been prescribed a tablet to enhance love making the first time he took it things were great, then I started getting the story that he couldn't find the tablets, then I find the pack empty!! He says that they weren't in the pack hed taken them out and lost them! He leaves for work so early,way earlier than needs to, when I take him to work if I need the car, and when I pick him up I get stared at and chit chatted about and get snickered at he says its my imagination but I don't feel so, he hardly talks to me, and there's no affection, I've asked him if he's happy like this and he says things are fine but there no t and I've told him I'm so un happy but he doent care IM SO SAD we've been togthter since we were thirteen I'm sorry its so long but I need some help guys PLEASE

sexymamma3186 · Feb 6, 2007, 10:44 PM

I would try couples therapy if you want to stay together. 20 years is a long time to just walk away. If he refuses to talk to you then maybe its for the best but I would try and work it out. It seems that he might be hiding something, I would just make him some dinner and get him in a good mood and try and reconnect. Maybe he's just stressed out being a nurse and getting diagnosed with cancer can take a lot out of a person, he may not feel like he can please you anymore. Like I said I would try therapy, even without him they may be able to help you find ways to talk to him.

greyraven · Feb 9, 2007, 01:50 PM

My mother left my father after 20 years of marriage and never looked back.

I think he might be involved with someone else... That's where those pills may have gone. :-(

Losing a testicle? He might be seeking validation someplace.. else.

I hope not though. Don't despair, but don't be his rug. Get yourself/selves some therapy. If he's a nurse you get benefits I should hope, so there's no reason not to do it.

First you'll need to confront him though.

Good luck!
GR

jack jackson · Feb 26, 2007, 05:45 PM

Find someway to ascertain whether or not he's [or had has] having an affair, the situation implements that you do so, that's the last option he's left you if [every thing else fails] obviously this question troubles you. For then, you'll have a lot better understanding about the truth of the problem. If he is, then you'll have make a decision. __________________________________________________ _______________ If I have seen beyond the mountain into the valley of the shadow of truth, it is because I have stood on the shoulders of giants