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Nothingbutaface · Sep 29, 2011, 11:52 PM

My boyfriend has been acting weird for a while now. We are both males.

And he just doesn't want to touch me like he used too, or even want to make me feel great about myself. What I'm trying to say is that we really never get sexual any more.

He says he is tired from work, but I also am tired, but I am never too tired to be physically intimate with him. He doesn't kiss me the way he used to, or even look at me the way he once did. He tells me he is in love with me, but, sometimes I feel like we are just friends.

I will catch him looking at other men, and that really bothers me a lot and even though I told him that, I always catch him checking them out. I try to do anything and everything just to make him smile.

I always surpise him with little things here and there. He does get me things and takes me out, but that's not all I'm looking for. I want him to make me feel special. He also looks at porn and I told him to stop because it makes me feel bad about myself. He wanted me to stop and I did. I haven't looked at porn since the time he asked me to stop.

He lied to me a couple of times and he said he hasn't looked at it. Then one day I asked him and he told me the truth. If he is looking at other men and looking up porn doesn't that mean I'm not what he is looking for?

I just feel like I'm doing something wrong. I feel so bad about myself and I am craving for his attention. I get really mad when he gives other guys the attention I'm looking for. I call him out on it and he yells at me and tells me that I'm starting ****.

I don't know; I love him, but he hasn't been treating me like he really loves me. He is treating me more like a good friend. What would you do if you were in my position?

CliffARobinson · Sep 30, 2011, 12:05 AM

Every relationship, straight, bi, gay, and everything in between, runs into problems like you are describing at one time or another.

How long have you been together, and what are your ages?

Nothingbutaface · Sep 30, 2011, 06:26 AM

We have been going out for a year. I'm 23 and he is 25. Thanks for responding. I just think at this time in our relationship, it's time to move on. I don't want to, and neither does he, but if there is nothing we can do, why drag something on that isn't working.

martinizing2 · Sep 30, 2011, 07:32 AM

Have you considered counselling to try and figure it out?

How solid is your communication between each other? Communication is essential to build and maintaining a good relationship.
It helps build the trust that is the other essential of good relationships.

If neither of you want to separate you might try working these areas before you make that final decision to separate.

CliffARobinson · Sep 30, 2011, 08:22 AM

Martinizing is right, counseling is the best avenue to get at the root of the problem.

From your question, I assume you are living together? When did you move in together? Did you talk a lot about moving in together before doing it? About what it meant for the relationship, etc.

How much time elapsed before you moved in? Have either of you ever been in a committed relationship before? If so, how long and why did they end?

These are all questions to start thinking about. If you want to answer them, we can continue to help you see the situation more clearly, perhaps.

Thank you for trusting us with your relationship issue.