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My Husband Has Cheated 3 times in 20 years
My husband cheated a year after we were married, and I forgave him, and now I find out he cheated with two women back in April 2011.
We have 6 kids together, life hasn't been perfect, but I thought we were good. That we had a strong marriage, but now I feel that everything is a lie. I have heard that cheating is the easy way out of marriage, but he won't go move out. He says that he now realized how much he loves me, and doesn't want to lose me, to let him show me that we can be good, or better again. He said he was sorry over, and over again, he cried, and he beg for me to forgive him, but I don't know if I can. I'm so hurt, so betrayed, I feel that my life is ending. I don't know how to fix myself sometime. I don't want to go on living. Please somebody help me |
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What do YOU want to do? Sometimes finances make it impossible to leave. Would I trust him? No. Would I go to counselling (with or without him), yes. Cheating is one thing; lying to you is another. I don't think you need to fix yourself - he needs to fix himself. The first step to get your bearings and strength is to seek counselling from a third party - perhaps a clergyperson? |
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Thank you,
He has apologized so many times that I can't even count, I sometimes hear him cry when he thinks that I'm sleeping. Money is a problem but if I had to I would make it. And I love him I just can't forgive him and I don't know if I ever will and I know it's a weak excuse but my kids love him that I don't want to hurt them. When I first found out I kick him out of my house and all my kid were crying and asking me to call there dad and ask him to come home, of course they don't know what there dad did to get kicked out of the house,but when they don't see, I fight a lot with him he said he is willing to take anything I do as long as I don't live him. So I'm taking one day at time and see how it gos |
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Have you considered marriage counseling?
He's cheated 3 times in the 20 years you've been together. I don't know if he's really sorry, or only sorry that he got caught. Have you asked him how he'd feel if you had cheated? Ask him how he expects you to forgive him and move on when he's done this not once, not twice, but 3 times. What guarantee do you have that this won't happen again. He's shown that he can control himself. If you want to make this work, then you have to ask yourself if you can forgive him and move on. You have to ask yourself how you'll feel if he does this again. |
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