[ann1960]

Ive been with my partner for a year. After been with him only a month he had a manic episode and was hospitalised. I know he is the one with the mental illness ,and I am the one that feels in the wrong all the time. I think he can take me or leave me. He seems emotionaless. Yet he wants me to be happy and smiling and running the whole show. He is very intelligent and I feel fairly stupid around him. Sometimes I think he loves me ,other times I think he doesent give a damn. I am 50 yrs old, mabey I should know better.

[juzzi71]

I am bypolar Im 40 this year, My mania is not as bad as your boyfriends and fingers crossed I have never been hospitalized but My Mum has most of her life . I don't remember most things close friends and family tell me and while manic it can seem like I'm uninterested in what anybody else says or does the thruth is while in that state My head is filled with so many different thoughts ,things to do, what to say,plans to make and so on and so on But my close friends know me and all about my bypolar and I love them with all my heart. Im wondering if your boyfriend is not as open as I am with the people I love because to say out loud to someone the things you see and hear really does seem like madness but sharing these things helps them understand you, and they know that I love them, and they love me. And when Im really Manic they help me through things without making me feel like a total lunitic . I am so creative while manic and they always put me to good use . My best advise is ask him lots of questions about what is going on in his head and even though the things he may tell you seem insane you will understand them 100 times more Be Happy. Xx .Justine xx

[ramona_]

Being in a relationship with an individual with bipolar can be very tricky. The key to any relationship and especially those where one partner has different needs to the other is actively working at it. Do more things together, communicate with each other and learn with each other.

Your bipolar partner can help you learn how to cope and you can teach your bipolar partner how to control themselves. I am a strong believer in that a professional should take the job of teaching a bipolar to control themselves better but you can help them a lot too in aspects that a professional couldn't, such as intimacy.

My boyfriend and I are both Borderline's and the key to our relationship is openness, understanding one and others needs and trust. I trust my boyfriend to be there no matter what and care for me when I am a danger to myself and I do exactly the same for him. We speak to each other about what we are feeling and thinking, we monitor and record it. We learn from each other how to cope, understand and love.

At first, a one sided Bipolar relationship can be hard, it just takes a while for the non-Bipolar to get used to their partners activities and impulses. It can feel like walking on egg shells but I bet, when you think he doesn't give a damn, he does, he cares about you very much but his mind can not allow him to do certain things when in certain stages of mania or depression.

Just stick with it and learn to communicate with each other.
Best wishes. Ramona.