[perez420]

So we've been together for about 5 months and everything has been perfect but she's been really busy with school stuff and she goes to church a lot not saying I'm not religious but her parents don't know she's dating me and she's 18.

Well since her school we've been getting into little arguments but it seems like we know when its going to happen because its becoming a regular thing but the thing is I love her and I just want to be with her I want her to do everything with me but I get that it can't happen because were our own people.

Well the other day I broke up with her because the whole thing of her mom not knowing. I still want to be with her but, it seems like everything she does with me she has to lie to her parents. So yeah then it came back on me like I feel like I did the wrong thing. She says I really hurt her and I hate it because I don't like it.

I told her I want to be with her if she tells her parents about me. I told her I was tired of being in the shadows. I want to start going to church with her but her mom and dad go there, and supposedly her mom is a psycho, and she would never be able to see me.

In her mind she thinks all we do is fight. In my head I want to fix it but, now she's saying she wants a couple of days to think. I don't know what to do because I know what she's doing. She's seeing if she really wants me now or not. What sucks is that she's thinking that now I don't know what to do anymore because I keep telliin her I love her but she still tells me the same thing does it sound like she's completley done with me

[southamerica]

I honestly don't know why you're bothering with her.

She's extremely religious, her family's extremely religious, and she's hiding her family from her boyfriend and her boyfriend from her family. Even if you try to show her you want to have more in common with her (i.e. you want to go to church with her), she's resistant. All of the secrecy would be a red flag for me.

I understand that perhaps she doesn't want to let you too close yet in case you're not "the one", but at 5 months I would want my significant other to allow me to try and do the things that are important to him/her.

So does it seem like she's completely done with you? I think she's confused-she doesn't know if you will break up with her again or if you'll fit in to her life-but that's partially on her for not letting you in.

If she's still unwilling to let her family know that you even exist-then I'd say you should walk away and let her figure herself out while you move on to someone more stable.

[mmresd]

She is completely done with you? You are the one that broke up with her... Not only that, but now you have also given her an ultimatum, is either you break up with her or she tells her parents. Now you are going to have to wait till she makes a decision, she might not want to tell her parents and your pushiness will send her packing, or she will decide that you are worth it and tell her parents about you two, if she is from a strong religious family, odds are against you.

Good Luck,
Javi

[talaniman]

You dumped her because you couldn't deal with the way she wanted things, so now leave her alone.

She obviously has issues that you can't understand, or help with, and that makes for an unhealthy relationship. Leave her alone, you have done enough damage, and have been damaged enough yourself.