[mommy2both]

OK I need a little advice on what to do...
My (former) fiancé and I are going threw a bit of a rough patch. Things are getting tough and stressful but I am trying to do everything I can to keep this relationship going. I love this man with my whole heart and do not want to lose him. The problem is that he is having second thoughts now... We have been together for about five years and have two beautiful children together but he also doesn't want to stay together just for the kids. I want my children to have their family together but I want to strive for a happy healthy relationship to raise them in. He is feeling like he doesn't want to be tied down the rest of his life and wonders what someone else could have to offer his life instead of me... I am very hurt that he has these feelings but I am trying to stay strong and help him through things. But it's hard when he doesn't know what he wants or if he even wants to be with me at all... he doesn't like having these feelings but he doesn't know what to do to help them go away and neither do I... does anybody have any advice?

[amicon]

You alone aren't responsible for the making or breaking of your relationship.

Have you suggested couple's therapy to him?

Your children must come first,so some workable solution must be found,even if you split up.

Both of you must work on being the best possible parents you can be.

[talaniman]

You cannot make decisions for him, and the fact is that relationship or not, your children are your connection for a long time to come. Back off, and let him work his own issues out, no pressure because you only have one decision too make, raising your children.

You can't make him be a good partner, so give him space to make a decision, or better yet, make one for yourself, that doesn't include his happiness, just yours. If you stop working so hard to keep him, he may decide to stay on his own, and if not, agree to be good parents.

Yes its hard, but its something you must do.

[FLICKER689]

Hello mommy2both this seems to be a scare to marry some men have a hard time believing in setteling down because they hate the feeling like you said tied down now I could only imagine the hurt your going through but if he didn't want you for the rest his life why did he purpose? Is a question you should be asking him or is interested in another woman many thoughts run through your head but I can tell you're a strong woman and you want the best for your family so do I.. So the advice I give you is hold in there this might only be a phase your man is going through cause of scared marry thoughts every man has them promise same with my husband :) it will work out if not an this is truly how he feels give it a break let him take sometime to himself to do whatever to get that erge out of his system and if he comes crawling in your arms he's a keeper hope for the best