[remorse]

I had an affair with a married woman and now she is pregnant by me. What are my options for visitation or custody?

[talaniman]

I am afraid you will have to wait for the baby to be born, and paternity established, that is if she tells her husband that it may not his. Since you have not provided that info, you have to wait for the facts to become apparent, so a decision can be made. Until the paternity is confirmed, you really have no rights that a court can enforce.

If indeed you are proved to be the father, if she agrees to a paternity test, then its very possible to get shared custody, and visitations, and child support. It depends really on how far everyone wants to take this.

Consulting with a lawyer is your best bet, because he knows the local, and state laws that apply, and the costs.

[this8384]

I had an affair with a married woman and now she is pregnant by me. What are my options for visitation or custody?

As talaniman pointed out, you have the right to request a paternity test. Because of the fact that she is married, the husband will most likely be assumed to be the child's legal father.

Regardless of whether she decides to tell her husband, you have a right to challenge the child's paternity. Laws vary depending on where you are located; what might apply in one state is completely useless in another. Some states have a statute of limitations on challenging paternity; others are much more lenient. Would you mind sharing where you're located?

If the court orders a DNA test, then she has to comply - she cannot simply refuse because she doesn't want her husband to find out about her affair.

[remorse]

I live in Florida she's in California, I am single. I found out about the baby from running into her at a work conf. while she was 7 months pregnant, she wasn't going to tell me. She can't tell her husband about the affair and he thinks it is his. I want to respect her wishes but I am 50 yrs, this is my only child. Need to know IF I have legal rights before moving forward, I don't want to disrupt her family life causing her pain if I have no legal options open to me.

[this8384]

I live in Florida she's in California, I am single. I found out about the baby from running into her at a work conf. while she was 7 months pregnant, she wasn't going to tell me. She can't tell her husband about the affair and he thinks it is his. I want to respect her wishes but I am 50 yrs, this is my only child. Need to know IF I have legal rights before moving forward, I don't want to disrupt her family life causing her pain if I have no legal options open to me.

Your only legal rights will be if you are the child's biological father. The only way to determine that is if you have a DNA test done.

If you ARE the father, then you'll most likely be asked to pay child support and be awarded some form of visitation rights. If you're not the father, then you walk away and nothing changes.

Unfortunately, that's the only way. Either you file for a test or you let it go, it's your call.

[GV70]

I had an affair with a married woman and now she is pregnant by me... I live in Florida she's in California... What are my options for visitation or custody?

Zero!
Third parties/ even biological parents/ are not allowed to bring paternity actions in the state of California in similar cases. Only husband and wife may disput husband's paternity in Cali.

Your only legal rights will be if you are the child's biological father.

True but not in California.
/Steven W. v. Matthew S Cal. Ct. App, and hundreds more cases./

[GV70]

§ 7540except as provided in Section 7541, the child of a wife cohabiting with her husband, who is not impotent or sterile, is conclusively presumed to be a child of the marriage.

§ 7541
a)Notwithstanding Section 7540, if the court finds that the conclusions of all the experts, as disclosed by the evidence based on blood tests performed pursuant to Chapter 2 (commencing with Section 7550), are that the husband is not the father of the child, the question of paternity of the husband shall be resolved accordingly.

(b)The notice of motion for blood tests under this section may be filed not later than two years from the child's date of birth by the husband, or for the purposes of establishing paternity by the presumed father or the child through or by the child's guardian ad litem. As used in this subdivision, "presumed father" has the meaning given in Sections 7611 and 7612.

(c)The notice of motion for blood tests under this section may be filed by the mother of the child not later than two years from the child's date of birth if the child's biological father has filed an affidavit with the court acknowledging paternity of the child.

[ScottGem]

Zero!
Third parties/ even biological parents/ are not allowed to bring paternity actions in the state of California in similar cases. Only husband and wife may disput husband's paternity in Cali.


True but not in California.
/Steven W. v. Matthew S Cal. Ct. App, and hundreds more cases./

Also, under CA law, when a child is born to a married couple, the husband is automatically considered the legal father. And, according to what GV posted, only the mother or husband can bring a challenge to that.

So legally you are out of the picture. But there is also a moral side to this. You had no business having an affair with this woman. Do not compound it by ruining her marriage. If you want a child then find a woman willing to bear one for you. Or, better yet, adopt one.

[Fr_Chuck]

And of course if you could file, husband would know, there is no way even where you can, to do it without causing problems.

Next of course you could contact husband and ask him to seek a paternity test to challenge, but that is about the only option