[He_comes_with_baggage]

I don't know I trust my boyfriend very much but I was looking for his phone the other day an I pulled out his work phone. An checked the text messages an there was one from today an it said my boyfriends name?? Then another text sent a little after that said?? These were from a girl I guess cause it said Kelly jane an some that were sent out but didn't have the date so I couldn't tell if they were from him cause it's a work phone different people use it everyday. He just took it home by accident. Anyway I said who's kelly jane he was like a friend from high school an I'm like well why is she texting you? He's like what are you talking about an I showed him. He's like I don't know other people use this phone you know. An I'm like why would it say your name then? He's like I don't know? Then deleted everyhting an I'm like why did you do that he said cause your not suppose to send text messages so he doesn't want his boss to see them even though there not his. I said well you better figure out why that girl is texting you cause she obviously knows who you are where you were an your cells an he said OK . I mean I don't think hed lie to me he never has. An like he knew this really pissed me off an he kept saying how he didn't know what these text messages were an how he loved me an that he would try to find out the next day at work. I mean I don't know it just weird like why would it say his name? An I don't think he is cheating on me but he said he never talked to the girl an if he was talking to her as a friend do you think he would hide that cause I said I wouldn't care just to tell me the truth you know.

[chuff]

Can I ask you an question. And I don't want you to respond right away. I want you to read it and then think about. Maybe even write it down then right an answer. But here it is and I want you to be honest with yourself...
"What about your boyfriend is causing you to stay with him?"

I mean you have all that drama with his ex. He's got a child that is being emotionally abused. That same child who once he get older is not going to listen to anybody and disrespect everybody. Now this comes along and it's obvious he's hiding something. I'm not sure to what extent but he's obviously lying.

I just don't see the value of this relationship. And don't tell me it's because you love him. I love food but I'm not going to eat a steak that's being sitting in sh!t for a week. You're questioning him, your questioning his ex, you know the kid isn't going to grow up in a healthy situation and yet you stay. Why? Are these all questions your asking because you really want out and your kind of dancing around the issue? I hope so to be honest. You've got a lot more going for than this situation is giving you. Honestly, if you got out of this situation, in years from now, hell maybe months from now you'd look back and say that was one of the smartest decisions you've ever made.

[summer123]

He is definitely hiding something, it is very suss, threaten to break up with him, and see his reaction if he does not care then there is something to worry about.

Kitty xxx

[Skell]

He is lying to you. I think there is a fair chance he is cheating, or at least is considering it.

But never the less he is clearly lying to you and you seem unable to accpet that this is the case.

How does it make you feel to know he is lying to you about this?

I agree with Chuff's post above.
Had to spread it sorry Chuff!

[talaniman]

I don't think hed lie to me he never has

Helloooooooooo, I think he would lie to keep you off his trail.
After reading you're other posts I have to agree with chuff and wonder why do you keep going through this. You may be in love but its not healthy.

[He_comes_with_baggage]

he is definately hiding something, it is very suss, threaten to break up with him, and see his reaction if he does not care then there is something to worry about.

kitty xxx

I did an he says that he will go to work tommarow an get me the number. I don't know

[Skell]

Get you what number?

[He_comes_with_baggage]

The phone number to kelly jane he keeps saying that these work phones are old maybe it was another work phone that texted him an maybe at one point that other phone was a secretaries there or something I said well to prove that to me you will have to bring me in this supposed other work phone an text the work pfone you have now an see if I it comes up as kelly jane

[Skell]

But he admitted to knowing Kelly Jane from school. How can it be someone from work>

So he is saying that someone from his work is texting or receiving texts from a person he went to school with?

That doesn't make sense to me. Im confused actually!

But what I'm not confused about is that he is lying!! Again!

[He_comes_with_baggage]

OK so he called me back an was like I figured out what happen. I'm like hat. He said my friend frank was at a party an was talking to her an she recognized my name an said she new me an just wanted to say hi.I guess. An I said that bull who would go to a party at eleven in the morning? Cause that the time the text from her was sent. An ten I'm like an why would your friend give her your work number. An he said I don't know maybe it was a party the night before an she texted me the next day? An I said well you said it yourself you take different work phones each day so how would she know you had that one that day? An he goes I don't know. I said well if she just wanted to say hi to you she would have said "hi troy this is kelly anne from high school remember me? Not troy? An he said I don't know why she did that but look you asked me to fined out an I did OK I love you an you know that. I no I asked you to get me the phone number. An he said well I don't know franks nt ere right now

[talaniman]

All this drama is so irrelevant, What do you honestly think is going on?

[He_comes_with_baggage]

Honesly nothing but I never know I mean he has never lied to me before but I don't know what to make of all this its like I'm looking for something that really isn't there I guess

[s_cianci]

Can I ask you an question. And I don't want you to respond right away. I want you to read it and then think about. Maybe even write it down then right an answer. But here it is and I want you to be honest with yourself....
"What about your boyfriend is causing you to stay with him?"

I mean you have all that drama with his ex. He's got a child that is being emotionally abused. That same child who once he get older is not going to listen to anybody and disrespect everybody. Now this comes along and it's obvious he's hiding something. I'm not sure to what extent but he's obviously lying.

I just don't see the value of this relationship. And don't tell me it's because you love him. I love food but I'm not going to eat a steak that's being sitting in sh!t for a week. You're questioning him, your questioning his ex, you know the kid isn't going to grow up in a healthy situation and yet you stay. Why? Are these all questions your asking because you really want out and your kind of dancing around the issue? I hope so to be honest. You've got a lot more going for than this situation is giving you. Honestly, if you got out of this situation, in years from now, hell maybe months from now you'd look back and say that was one of the smartest decisions you've ever made.

Couldn't spread it but this is a very thoughtful response and makes a lot of sense.

[Skell]

He is lying to you and you're completely oblivious to it.

Or I think you know he is lying to you but you are too afraid to admit it.

You sound like you depend on this guy. Not healthy!

Do you honestly think he is telling you the truth here. If you do I feel pity for you!

[chuff]

Okay so from yesterday we learned that he was caught lying to you. Then we know he made up some completely stupid lie to cover that lie. So then this morning he made up another lie, not even equally stupid - but in fact more stupid then the second lie to cover the first lie.

And your answer to Tal when he asked "what do you honestly think is going on" was

honesly nothing but i never know i mean he has never lied to me before but i dunno what to make of all this its like im looking for something that really isnt there i guess

So now I'm going to call you on it. If you believe his stupid lies, if you believe him to be a good father, if you believe his life situation one that is worthy of being involved in, if you believe that kid isn't going to wind up dead or in prison, then are you in fact just as stupid as him and these lies and this life situation?

And while your getting ready to somehow defend all this, I will point out that it has been 24 hours so answer this question

"What about your boyfriend is causing you to stay with him?"

[He_comes_with_baggage]

He is my soulmate my best friend he is the only one I give a damn about I would die for him

[Skell]

Would he die for you?

Does he really give a damn about you?

Would you still consider him your best friend and soul mate if you found out he had been cheating on you?

[chuff]

He is my soulmate my bestfriend he is the only one i give a damn about i would die for him

Okay after 24 hours that was the answer you came up with.

I agree with you though. You would die for him. Your dying slowly each day from the stress and confusion this is costing you. RIP.

[Megg]

Ok LET me say this...
I did this to my fiancé. I wrote text's to a guy I didn't know (just as bad as old friend) and said stuff I shouldn't have. I also wrote online too. Now my fiancé was pissed. GUESS what I did? I lied.. . Until I was caught. This time I couldn't lie. That whole thing almost recked my relationship with the best man ever! I've never done anything like that again, proud of it! BUT SERIOUSLY... you like him, you don't want to think he's lying, you don't want to think of not being with him. I've been there. Get him to tell you the truth and change or else leave his butt. You do deserve better.--Just remember people can change! God luck!

[intendedsighs]

Honey, if you don't get out of that relationship now, you're going to end up getting hurt really bad later on. Dont put yourself through that sh**.