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    Taniella's Avatar
    Taniella Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 13, 2011, 12:25 PM
    Step son hates please need advice
    My partners ex is a piece of work she has a child with my partner and he is 5yrz old. She bad mouthz me to her son and I don't like it I mean I've done everything I can for this boy and he really hates me I makes me feel really bad because all I want him to do is love me and know that ill always be there for him. His mother has told him a number of times that Im not his mother (which is true and I don't mind that) and that he doesn't have to listen to me, so every time he comes to our home he just ignores me and it hurts. He tells his dad that he doesn't like me and that his mother said that I'm not a good person and I'm teying to seal him away from his mother. (which is soooo not true. Please need help my stepson hates me...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #2

    Jan 13, 2011, 12:42 PM

    What do you tell him that he ignores?

    Do you ever read to him or have fun with him?
    mashpotatos's Avatar
    mashpotatos Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jan 15, 2011, 10:44 AM
    I know exactly how your stepson feels, I'm in that exact situation right now with my parents. My father got remarried and my mother is just bad mouthing the new wife like crazy. I was ignoring my step-mom because of what my mother said but then I started to give my step-mom a chance. I realized that she is an amazing person and that my mom was completely wrong about her. I suggest spending a day out with your step-son. Take him somewhere like the movies or hockey game, show him your 'cool'. But beware if you become that 'cool' parent he's going to think you will do anything for him to like you, so he will take advantage of your kindness, asking for things he knows his other parents won't let him have etc... Next I suggest talking to his mother about everything show her your not as bad as she thinks.

    Hope this helps :)
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #4

    Jan 15, 2011, 01:50 PM

    Im curious to know the ages of the adults involved here.

    You need to sit down with your partner and discuss this. And bring in the boys mother as well. You all 3 need to sit down away from the 5 year old and talk about this. You ALL need to quit using the child as the middle. Because he isn't. He shouldn't even KNOW what is going on between you adults. (im not saing YOU do this. But it sounds like his mother and possibly father do)

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