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    Lost4Now's Avatar
    Lost4Now Posts: 0, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 9, 2011, 03:31 PM
    How Do I Get Over Being Cheated On By My Fiance'?
    My fiance' and I had a very small, very insignificant disagreement and went a day without speaking. It was very hard on me, because we are (were) extremely close and loving to each other. I thought he was probably in the same amount of pain, if not more, as I was not having communicated for a day. I drove to his home this morning to surprise him and make up; he was with a woman. I am shocked, devastated, broken, lost and confused. I can't eat, function, hardly be alone in my head with my own thoughts. I feel out of control with anxiety, fear, desperation, all that - things I normally don't feel. Thoughts of suicide are constant. I am a single mom and my kids need me to function like a parent but I think I just would rather die. What can I do to handle this pain? I hate him, but I love him - I will never EVER let him see me again or touch me or anything. I truly despise him but can't get memories out of my head of happy times we have shared! This is such a shock - he never gave me a clue he was capable of hurting me like this. I can't believe it was him!!
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #2

    Jan 9, 2011, 05:16 PM
    Before you kill yourself, start at the beginning: exactly what did you see when you walked in to his house? (Use Answer, not Comment)
    LightCross's Avatar
    LightCross Posts: 87, Reputation: 29
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    #3

    Jan 10, 2011, 06:02 AM
    When you said that he was with a woman what happened between them? She could be only an acquitances of him, please explain abit more detail about what you saw.
    And no matter he cheated or not I won't suggest you do anything stupid on yourself, I know currently you are very desperate and sad but there is always a way to get up and make things better, plus you have a kid who still need you, at least thinnk about the kid. And if he really did cheat then maybe he is not a right person for you and you deserve much better.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #4

    Jan 10, 2011, 01:51 PM
    It's tough when people in despair don't answer back.
    We don't know if you attempted suicide.
    Or if you are embarrassed because the other woman turned out to be a sister/neighbor/housekeeper/carpooler/boss.
    Or if you are on a murder spree because he somehow managed to kindle, rekindle, or pay for a relationship in less than 24 hours.
    mystific's Avatar
    mystific Posts: 340, Reputation: 308
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    #5

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:10 PM

    Thoughts of suicide constantly and you have a children? How utterly selfish. All for what? A man?

    Time to put your adult cap on here. Before you have such a silly notion pass through your head again, consider the ripple affect. Consider yourself more worthy than what he does. After a spat he goes and sleeps with another woman? Is he really that worth it?

    Do yourself and your children a favour, pull yourself together, admit your life is a lot more fulfilling with you in it with the unconditional love from your kids and show them how to stand tall and proud through, what I'll loosely state as, adversity.

    Be the role model, focus on them.. perhaps rather than focusing on the negative you need to turn it around into a positive, you have more time with those who love you more.

    Reflect on how your actions, thoughts and words come across to your kids. No matter how well you think you're hiding it.. 'they know'. Honestly, look at your kids in the eye and ask yourself, could you be so selfish to take your own life and leave them to welfare?

    If all else fails, I strongly suggest counselling.
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #6

    Jan 10, 2011, 04:21 PM

    Get it together for goodness sake!

    You're a Mother. So act like one. This all over a guy? Really? I can't even fathom that...

    I know I sound rude, but to even consider suicide over this is beyond me. You are giving this guy WAY too much credit.

    IF this is how he is going to behave, then so be it. Let him go. He will do you a favor in the long run.

    Focus on those children. They NEED their Mother.

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