[aimeejv]

My now exboyfriend and I have been together for 3 1/2 years and have two children together. Our daughter is 23 months and our son 1 month. Basically, he was abusive to me. Before I found out I was pregnant with our daugther, he was locked up for a year for domestic violence against me. However, when he came out, I thought maybe he would change because we were both sober finally and we had a family now. He was still abusive but not as bad as before, just little hits here and there and a lot of emotional abuse. I thought it was OK and just dealt with it because I thought I was "in love" and he was the father of my child. Then I got pregnant again. For whatever reason he started to become more angrier but never seriously harmed me. And again I thought now we have two children and I still "loved him". I kept hoping that we will become a happy family. It never did. Unfortunately, what made me finally leave was when one day he came to attack while I was holding our new 1 month old son, and instead of hitting me, he missed and got our son. He went to the hospital with a fractured skull. Luckily he has no brain damage or anything, just sore. The father is in jail and gone forever from our lives. Yet, now cps has my children and I will be going to court soon to see if I can get them back. I have already signed up for parenting and domestic violence classes, therapy, and group counseling. What should I expect from the judge and what are my chances of having my kids back? I know it wasn't me who hit our son, but it was my decision to be back with this man even though I knew his history. I live everyday knowing that I made that decision and in way, caused this to happen to my son. But I do love my children and I want them back.

[joypulv]

This belongs in Family Law?
I just want to state the usual: arrive early, with neat and conservative appearance, respect for the court, and keep your answers on topic and concise. A good impression will be important. Have paper proof of all the help you have signed up for. You may be a bit soon for all this if you just signed up and have no attendance record to show for it.

[yazz1972]

So sorry to hear about what you've been through. I was in an abusive relationship as well but don't know what will happen in this matter with the children, but I just wanted to say, be strong and positive. Show that you are making changes to your life and you have support, if that is the case, and like the previouse message. Yes be presentable and courtious.And never ever put up with any kind of abuse again from anyone else. One little sign and that's it, don't continue with the relationship. You need to protect your children and yourself, who else will?. good luck

[answerme_tender]

I was a child of an extremely abusive father, and my mother never did leave, but hey I heard same stupid words out of her mouth, " I love him, he will change, just you wait" You know something he never did change, even after putting me in hospital 3times, but hey my Mother still believed he was going to change.

So my question to you, if you will answer honestly is:

Would you still be with him if he hadn't hit the baby?? Would you still be thinking he was going to change?

You see I don't think you would have left, I believe you still be there with him, making the excuses. Until he eventually hurt you bad enough where you would have been in hospital or he would have started in on your children. I maybe wrong, but only you really know the real answer. My fear is that most women go from one loser who abuses to the next one. What are you doing to improve your ability to NOT subject your children to this!!

I know that this doesn't really pertain to your question of what to expect about court, but I know what its like to feel the fist of an abuser, and someone should have stepped up, but never did for me--so I don't really care if this upsets you, but please never, ever put your children or yourself through this FEAR again.