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Cupcake01 · Nov 13, 2010, 02:28 PM

Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year now. We both want a baby badly, but we're young and not that dumb. We're not going to try and have one now of course but the urges are definitely strong. I know that taking care of a kid is really hard.. I love children and lately I've REALLY been yearning a child. Is this normal? I'm only going on 18 soon.. so I definitely don't want a kid yet because I'm trying to be smart about life and my decisions. I just really want to know why I'm having such strong urges to have one now all of a sudden though?

Wondergirl · Nov 13, 2010, 03:04 PM

It's a female thing. I wanted a baby since I was eight. Thankfully, my mother had my sister and eight years later, my brother, so helping with them kept me off the streets. In college, I did a lot of babysitting, and I finally had my first baby when I was 25 (and married with assets like savings, a car, no big bills, maturity).

My suggestion to you two is to get a dog from the local shelter. If you can, for three years, properly care for a dog, pay his vet bills, get him well-trained and -schooled, teach him tricks, feed him properly, and love him as unconditionally as he does you, you and your partner will be ready to have a baby and will do a good job as parents.

DoulaLC · Nov 14, 2010, 09:40 AM

For some women it is very normal... :) I can remember sometimes walking through the baby aisles in stores daydreaming about having a baby, and all the cute stuff! well before I was ready to actually have a baby.

Focus on getting yourself to the position of being able to take care of a baby the way you would like to first... finish your educations, have money put aside, have a career going, perhaps enjoy some traveling and having some freedom on your own for awhile first.

jimkeene · Nov 16, 2010, 03:32 AM

Hi. It's normal to feel that you want a child, especially if you are in love with someone very much. But, you have answered your REAL question... you should wait. Always try to deal with life from a position of strength. Remember, your child will look to you and follow your example. Get all your questions answered, look ahead and try and plan as to when would be the best time to have a baby, and figure out how MUCH that will cost and what you will need to have ready. Then, when you have these answers, you can make a good, intelligent decision. I know it's hard to wait, but this is your potential child we are taking about... another life. Don't you want him or her to have a good one?
Jim