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Kountrysk8er · Sep 25, 2010, 06:57 AM

In 2006 I got married in Florida and In 2007 had a child with a man who later that year got so heavy in drugs and alcohol that one night when I was at work, he left the baby (5 months old) alone in our apartment to go 30 minutes away to buy coke. When I got home from work I was such a stupid girl I didn't see he was coked out, Went to bed as normal after my bar tending shift and woke up to the car, my purse a few household items etc ponded for more coke. Yes my car! While calling the police my husband THEN tried to overdose on Tylenol Pm meds so they baker acted him. He stayed in a place to help him get clean for 3 months and I endured ALL of the ups and Downs life through at me and HE through my way. When he got out we went to 3 AA meetings before his GRANDMOTHER handed him Another beer and allowed him to Fall again. I left him later that year.

Its now 3 yrs later, I have tried my hardest to let him be a father to our son BUT he calls MAYBE once every other week IF that and it always ends in a horrible fight. Hes never paid a dime. Hes never bought clothes or diapers for our son. Ive supported him fully on my own with the help of my family which Makes me pretty much broke and Unable to pay for court fees for a divorce or child support. I just filed child support and the grandmother told the police officer she didn't know who my soon to be ex was or where he lives which is a lie because he lives with her. He is unstable, still drinks like hell Still does drugs and is not fit to see my son. I allow visits ONLY when he is with his mother (whom is a wonderful women with a wonderful relationship with my son) but now he says he wants solo visits because he is not getting along with his mother because she tells him its time to grow up. He has Not called in 3 weeks but now is about the time he calls and says he misses our son because he is bored and jobless AGAIN.

What are my rights? If I fight for full temp. custody until he gets his **** together am I tempting the judge to go the opposite way and allowing this man to have more personal time with my son when I know its unsafe? How can I go about NOT getting a 40, 000 dollar divorce? I know its not that much but they are expensive. How can I get on with my life and my sons life in a manner that will teach my son that what his father does and how he lives his daily DRUNKEN life is NOT OK?

cdad · Sep 25, 2010, 07:09 AM

Have you already filed for divorce? You have mention of all these things but we need to know what has been filed so far. Also knowing the general location (the state) will help get you answers as all states are different in some ways.

Kountrysk8er · Sep 25, 2010, 07:12 AM

No I haven't filed and its Florida

ScottGem · Sep 25, 2010, 07:13 AM

As to getting a divorce. It should not be that expensive. Even if he contests it, his proven drug addiction should make it a slam dunk. That should also restrict visitation to supervised visitation.

What I suggest is that you check with support groups for women in abusive marriages for legal help. Also check local law schools for free clinics.

cdad · Sep 25, 2010, 07:15 AM

First off you must file for divorce. You can't file for child support without it. In the filing you ask for custody based on (fill in the blank) and as Scott said you ask for supervised visitation as well as drug testing. He either comes clean or goes away.

AK lawyer · Sep 25, 2010, 07:27 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

As to getting a divorce. It should not be that expensive. Even if he contests it, his proven drug addiction should make it a slam dunk. That should also restrict visitation to supervised visitation.

What I suggest is that you check with support groups for women in abusive marriages for legal help. Also check local law schools for free clinics.

If you want to consider doing it yourself, here are the forms some of which you would need.