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    domgranny's Avatar
    domgranny Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 12, 2010, 06:45 PM
    Can a 12 year old say who he wants to live with in calif
    A 12 year old that has been living with his grandparents for the past 5 years continuously and of and on prior to that , father very difficult to deal with was ordered to anger mgmt classes never went, ( mom and dad divorced since child was born). Mom asked for increase in child support so dad has demanded huge increase in visits. This child is just a pong for both parents, so child has been ordered to stay 3 weeks with dad, he went on 7/10 and today 7/12 he has texted me several times he there with a teenaged cousin who he barley knows this cousin has been annoying him all day calling him wrong name wants to play slash fighting?? My grandson very hungrey has not eaten today 4PM was told he was old enough to cook his own food... he texted that he was sososo hungrey didn't know what to put his food on to microwave it,(he has not been in this house in aprox 3-4 years, I told him what to do (I send groceries with him)
    I called him a little later and heard loud loud noise in background he said the other boy was messing aound on piano. My grandson has aspergers and is on medication, he is very intelligent uses his laptop a lot not a lot of rough house playing, no adult at home today. He has expressed in no uncertain terms that he needs to come home oh yes his allergies have gone crazy were not like that before he left. Does he have any say in any of this, he knows better than both parents what is best for himself & is there anything that I as grandmother can do? Legal custody etc.? I saved the text messages.

    Csb in calif
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    Jul 12, 2010, 06:52 PM

    No
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Jul 12, 2010, 07:08 PM

    No, in fact unless grandparent has some legal custody given, they have no right to even keep child, and the non custody parent could use that to get custody or get more visits.

    Also a 12 year old, should have been taught long ago to do some basic cooking in the kitchen ( has he not ?) but of course it is extremely possible he is lying just to try and make someone come get him. ( like kids at camp does)

    And sorry but "so" there is a cousin he does not know, in a few weeks they may be best of friends, this is how family get to know each other.

    But the custody parent has the duty to provide the child on the days and times of visits or they could be held in contempt of court.

    And I think ( but could be wrong) if mom and others have been supportive about him going to dad, he may also not be so upset either.

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