[butterflyx]

My boyfriend got on particularly well with a mutual friend, and although she speaks perfect english they chose to speak in Italian for long lengths. After tolerating being excluded from conversations, I finally asked them to speak in english so I (and our mate David) could understand and join in. Instead, my boyfriend defended her as he felt she struggled with english. Meanwhile she retorted in english, ' isn't David useful to you ?' (meaning can you speak to David as you are in the way). Afterwards I accused my boyfriend of flirting right under my nose, he denied it and said she had flirted with him. I had confided in this woman that I was experiencing relationship troubles, and it hurts to know she still flirted with him. I have explained to my boyfriend I feel betrayed by her, and will no longer be hiring her to work with me. He is annoyed with my decision to sack her, and 'sees me as a lesser person'. This is very hurtful to me as I have recently conceded in making a huge sacrifice for our relationship to work, but despite my gesture he considers me as a 'lesser person' over this current issue. I would like my boyfriend to have no more to do with her, but he is adamant to keep her as friend and meet her for drinks etc. He says she hasn't betrayed him (implying its okay for him to hang out with her) and questions my version of events (even though he says I am a 100 percent trustworthy person). I've tried to let this all go, but I had to raise it again as its not sitting well with me. My boyfriends told me he loves me and wants to have kids with me soon, and says I must trust him - and not to worry. Am I being insecure, jealous, controlling and possessive? Can I trust him?? Or am I right to make demands or at least keep this woman away from me?

[lindacentenzor]

I think you're totally right, and its totally wrong and disrespectful of him to try and keep her on as a friend. It sounds totally fishy as well. In reverse roles I doubt itd be OK for you to keep on a friend of his who deliberately flirted with you like that. She sounds rude and manipulative and it is fully appropriate to not want your boyfriend exposed to that kind of hussy. Definitely under no circumstance condone their relationship. In fact, maybe you should start to wrap your head around your boyfriend being untrustworthy and being open to her manipulation.. if so dump him. You don't need that.