[jesmo43]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a couple of months but have known each other for over a year. After we started dating his ex girlfriend, of two years of and on, told him she was pregnant with his child. The problem is that they broke up because he caught her cheating on him. She denies that she cheated and insists that the baby is his. She even had a native american ritual done that supposedly proved that he was the father. He told her he'd have a paternity test when the baby was born but she continues to harass him. She's shown up at our work with her mom, constantly emails him and texts him. He's had to change his number already but she got it again for a mutual friend of theirs. He insists that he loves me and that he will stay with me even if the baby is his but I'm still worried that he'll leave me just because of their history and that his personality makes him very willing to please everyone. Reassurance and advice please.

[Boricua1]

I know this may not help.. but all you can do is realize that if he does pick misery to please everyone else then good riddance to him..

Girl I have had this same sitaution happen to me three different times in my life.. and trust me.. if he is that stupid.. you DO NOT want him in the long run.. just wait it out.. but always consider this... If he picked a ridiculous crazy broad in the first place, and ran the risk of possibly getting her preganant.. he may have a few more stupidity issues than you realize right now.. and definitely more drama than you need... you can always walk away.. ask yourself... How many crazy stupid guys did you let knock you up this year?. or ever... LOL... I call it the Drama-meter" how do you measure up?.. usually people that are "victims" to alot of dramatic abuse from others.. "the Goody guy" bogged down by the "Bad evil B*tch"... has alot under the table you have yet to find out about...

"The what would I do?" or "How likely would this situation happen in reverse" (on your end) rhetorical question can help you in your decision....

Remember in the end his fault or not if this crazy broad does have his baby this will always be something that will effect his life.. and your too if you are a serious part of his life..

I was going to marry a guy with baby momma drama once.. and don't you know when we moved in together.. the ish hit the fan with her... she was super lazy and crazy, she quit her job, and guess who had to pitch in to keep her bills paid to keep a roof over his child's head.. and WE were struggling.. but ... could I complain?... could i say.. "Hey what the heck?. WE GIT BILLS TOO?! " then I look like a crappy person trying to dictate something about his child.. well.. I had no problems with the child.. but the mother and the child are a package deal... and it can affect you... financially and emotionaly.. think it over.. and I wish the best of luck to you both...

[Boricua1]

For got to add.. the situation when another ex choose the stupid baby momma to please everyone... well.. I'm happy without any of them.. his life sucks.. oh well.. he could have been happy with me.. but I have to see it this way...

He obviously didn't want happiness... and NEVER believe that some of the men who do that don't "Like" that misery in some way or thrive off it.. they get some knind of emotional pay off, or excuse... because NO man stays with a woman he doesn't want.. NO HOW NO WAY... think about the times you may have been dumped for seemedly NO reason whatsoever... when you did everything right... nothing you could say or do would make him stay right?

Or better yet.. compare the level of comitment this guy has for you to this scenario... think of that guy that you DON'T like who really loves you... YOU Can't DO NOTHING to make him go away can you?. well a person who DOES like you should show some of this assuredness about how right you are for them...

. So don't believe the hype... If there is some shakiness or shadiness on his behalf on what he wants to do... I would say keep it moving and let them sort out the train wreck without you... cause if he decided he didn't want her then and moved on to you.. he should realize that even with a baby SHE ain't the one... if they couldn't work it out just the two of them a screaming, needing, money costing, baby only complicates things if he can't realize it.. again.. good riddance get someone with less drama... it may hurt now but in the end you'll feel happier...