[Lampeteyrules]

I'm 25 and live at home with my mum and 15 year old sister. I moved out and came back home partly to help out with my sis as she was reaching an age where my mum couldn't handle her by herself, as my parents are divorced and my dad lives in another country, and it was cheaper for me. The problem is I feel like a teenager again, granted I should tidy my room and my mum has a right to tell me too if it gets too messy.

The problem happened two days ago, when she was giving a tour of the house to her friends and she felt the need to let them into and to show them my bedroom. I'm a very private person and generally don't like people in my room. I feel like my privacy has been invaded and that surely she could have left them out of my room. I'm wondering if I should move out again, and just have my own space as I feel like I'm a bit too old to be getting told about my room and that the thing with the tour, sort of tipped me over the edge. Thing is my mum does need me at home right home and I'm happy staying but I need my own space too. Do you think my privacy was invaded or I'm making too much out of nothing...

[twinkiedooter]

You said you were needed at home. I think you are making a huge mountain out of an ant hill. Ask your mom to please try and not give the Cook's tour to include your room in the future when she shows her friends her home. And then leave it at that.

[Gemini54]

I think that your mother should respect your privacy. Yes, you are home to both help out and save money but you're an adult now and your mother should be prepared to respect this.

Speak to her really nicely about it and ask her not to include your room in the 'cooks tour' unless she's asked you first. Let her also know that you will keep your door shut from now on, and that she doesn't need to remind you to be tidy.

Living together as adults is about compromises and this is a small compromise on her part. I'm sure she would feel awkward if you showed your friends round her bedroom.