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    timpotte's Avatar
    timpotte Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 23, 2009, 09:05 AM
    Betrayal of a women
    This is a long story short.

    We were dating for 2 years and do to work obligations I had to leave her in March 08 and had a slight breakup during this time but reconciled and were back together.

    She informed me April that she planned a trip for the girls to another country. This trip was to take place in June 08.

    I come to find out that this trip was with another man Aug 08. Additionally I find out that her four year old son is his this mans child. Her story then was that she went to discuss child support. However they stayed in same hotel. She swears nothing happen between them.

    I forgave her for this indiscretion. With conditions she must rid us of this man from our lives. I had thrown out the all the mementos from the trip.

    In November 08 I found hidden all those mementos I had thrown out.

    Again I had forgiven her and asked her to stop and she agreed again. Knowing this man was overseas and I was there I figured it was just a thought.

    In December 08 she set up a new email account with his her first name and his last name. Another argument ensued but still I remained.

    Several arguments followed in the months about online communication with him and leading to a letter in March 09 stating it would be over if this activity did not stop. Basically begging and saying this hurts so much.

    I am sure though I can not prove it that more conversation occurred between then and May 09. She left her messenger open and I looked. She stated to him "How did it feel seeing me again" "How do you feel about me" "I have not let go yet"

    This was the final straw and we are separated since then. She is a loving person and in some aspects I would love her back. However I feel that this betrayal because I allowed it continue she would never stop. Can I just get some feed back. Please do not be cruel but constructive. I realize this sounds very crazy to even consider.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #2

    Jun 23, 2009, 09:16 AM

    Leave her alone and find someone else that won't do what she did.

    You shouldn't kick nor keep this guy out of her life because he is her son's father. However, she did cross the line with him and covered it up with lies that left you second guessing her. Proof prove that she were up to no good so it is time to close that chapter of your life.

    Just know that all females aren't like her and you can't change someone. If someone is going cheat or have to you can stop nor change them.
    tryintolive69's Avatar
    tryintolive69 Posts: 10, Reputation: -5
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    #3

    Jun 23, 2009, 09:20 AM

    Hey tim potte,let this woman exit stage right out of your life,there's a saying in the my town,you can do bad by yourself. She is torned between you and her baby daddy and since they have a child together,you are the weakest link so to speak. Just move on there is a good woman out there for you,don't give up on love.
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #4

    Jun 23, 2009, 11:08 AM

    I know it hurts but the truth is you were living with lies, and the trust is gone. As long as the trust is gone, you will keep having doubts about your relationship, and it will continue to eat you up inside, and the relationship is doomed.


    Second, she has a child with this man so him not being apart of the child life is a big request to ask of someone.

    In the end I think you are probably better off without someone who insist on lying time and time again. Turn the volume up on your intuition and let her go.
    timpotte's Avatar
    timpotte Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 23, 2009, 06:01 PM

    See I guess the a part out of the whole thing. This man was never apart of the child's life. He did not even know until that day they went on a trip together. I was told it was another mans child till that day. He never supported him. I had supported her 100% financially the entire time. She used money I sent for household groceries to pay for the trip. So what I was asking was nothing more then what had been the normal the first 2 1/2 years of the relationship. I think though it is too much to ask.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #6

    Jun 23, 2009, 06:30 PM

    She has lied about everything, even about her child father.

    Enough, is enough.

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