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ipod_geru · Jun 15, 2009, 07:50 PM

Okay, I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and 6 months .
(Longest relationship with me because they all breakup the day before valentines day.)
Im 14 years young.
And at first it wasn't serious
but I love him now.
He loves me.
He promises he won't touch me sexually because Im not ready.
=)
Im a proud virgin.
And he has kept his promise for a year and six months .
but; recently, I've
been having "wet dreams" about him.
What do I do?
tell him?
Im scared.
Im young& I don't know how to relieve the sexually frustration & NO! I don't plan on going out &having sex.
so what should I do?

Alty · Jun 15, 2009, 07:57 PM

What is it you want to do?

I'm glad that you're not planning on rushing into sex, you're too young.

Having said that, nothing wrong with self exploration, but others will disagree with me.

Masturbation is a great way to relieve sexual tension, learn how your body works and the benefit is, no concern of possible pregnancy or STD's.

Waiting until your older for sex is a great thing, you say you're proud and you should be. :)

Good luck.

503person · Jun 15, 2009, 07:58 PM

I say don't tell him... it'll put the idea in his head and he'll be expecting to have sex soon. 14 is too young, much much much too young.

ipod_geru · Jun 15, 2009, 08:03 PM

Altenweg , are you sure?
I thought about self-exploration, but Im afraid sort of shy.
&thanks.
=]
I am proud.

ipod_geru · Jun 15, 2009, 08:05 PM

Originally Posted by 503person

I say don't tell him...it'll put the idea in his head and he'll be expecting to have sex soon. 14 is too young, much much much too young.

your right to!
So I want tell him.
=D

Alty · Jun 15, 2009, 08:10 PM

Originally Posted by ipod_geru

Altenweg , are you sure?
I thought about self-exploration, but Im afraid sort of shy.
&thanks.
=]
I am proud.

Why are you afraid?

If it's against your religion, I understand and won't go any further, but if it's just fear, well, there's nothing to be afraid of.

It's your body. You own it. Don't you want to know how it works, what makes it tick?

Self exploration is healthy, that's my belief, but like I said, others will disagree.

I think we can all agree that we'd rather you masturbate then have sex.

Bottom line though, don't do anything you aren't ready for. If masturbation is not something you're comfortable with then don't do it. It's just a suggestion, and yes, most people do it. ;)

Take your time, no hurry.

ipod_geru · Jun 15, 2009, 08:27 PM

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Why are you afraid?

If it's against your religion, I understand and won't go any further, but if it's just fear, well, there's nothing to be afraid of.

It's your body. You own it. Don't you want to know how it works, what makes it tick?

Self exploration is healthy, that's my belief, but like I said, others will disagree.

I think we can all agree that we'd rather you masturbate then have sex.

Bottom line though, don't do anything you aren't ready for. If masturbation is not something you're comfortable with then don't do it. It's just a suggestion, and yes, most people do it. ;)

Take your time, no hurry.

Im scared cause what if I do it wrong? :O
&no its not against my religion.
And most people do it?

Hmm.. . I think I will try tonight when my parents are asleep.
Im sure not ready for sex! I hear it hurts really bad!

Alty · Jun 15, 2009, 08:39 PM

Originally Posted by ipod_geru

Im scared cause what if I do it wrong? :O
&no its not against my religion.
And most people do it?

Hmm . . . . I think I will try tonight when my parents are asleep.
Im sure not ready for sex! I hear it hurts really bad!

Sex the first time can hurt, but not for all women, but you're not a woman yet. There's no hurry and really, keeping your virginity until you're ready, that's something very special. Don't rush into something like that until you're ready.

The majority of people masturbate. It's pleasurable, enjoyable and much safer then sex. Like I said, it's your body, you should know what you own.

Depending on the relationship you have with your parents, you could discuss this with them. I know it's embarrassing, and not all parents are willing to talk to their kids about sex or masturbation, but, if you're parents are open to talking to you, they're really the people you should be talking to about this.

Don't Google masturbation, you won't find anything helpful, you'll only find smut. Sadly everyone loves to make a buck off something that is natural, not at all dirty.

It's up to you and what you're comfortable with, what you want. But this is a great alternative to actually having sex.

Just be proud and happy to be who you are. Don't hurry to grow up, there's plenty of time for that. But, we were all there once, and yes, we went through the same stuff. Back then we didn't have the internet to turn to, so it was all up to us and many of us (myself included) made ill informed decisions and ended up regretting it.

Whatever you're comfortable with. Just remember that and you'll be okay. :)

Nestorian · Jun 15, 2009, 10:31 PM

Read about your body, learn what turns you on, what you like, how you like it, and learn about yourself at your own pace.

Take care.

sweet1028 · Jun 20, 2009, 12:00 PM

You shouldn't be scared to explore your own body and find out what makes things work for you. Why be scared? You will be alone and there will be nobody there to tell you if you do it wrong or right... I don't know if there is a wrong or right to masterbating.
As for being a virgin and wanting to stay that way I am very proud of you. My friends are always telling me how they regret this and that and wish they would've waited until they found the right guy who they wanted to be with and then had sex. Myself, I can't say much because I did have sex at 15 but, I have been with this guy over four years and we plan to be married. He was my first and my only.
Another thing, if you really want things to be incredible for your first time, wait until your married for the honeymoon. I know it sounds old fashioned but I'm 19 years old now and I wish that I would've waited until after marriage to have sex. Once you get older you will realize this, and the man you want to spend the rest of your life with, will not be worried about having sex with you if you are truly the one he wants to be with. Hope everything works out.

jenniepepsi · Jun 20, 2009, 12:06 PM

Hey hon, just wanted to point out that having the sexual dreams are perfectly normal for your age :) your hormones are doing it :)

And altenwing is correct. Masturbation is a perfect way to help in this situation.

The best way to start is to simply lay down on your bed, nakked in your room with the lights off and the door locked. Then simply massage anything you feel like. Your breasts, your vagina, your stomach and go with whatever feels right to you.