[carla123]

My heart bled for my close female friend who is in a very bad state. Please help her. Here is what she has to say (as said by her). Any advice would help my poor friend.

"I had a serious relationship with a guy a year back, for four months, and it was the sweetest days of my life! I really loved him sooo much, but unfortunately it had to end there, casue i was forced to split due to various reasons. We split while we were both very much in love, and it took me long time to accept the fact that i can NEVER get him back, and even he is living with this HARSH REALITY.

Anyways....Its a year now, and i am over it. My character has changed ever since and I'm very mature now I can't be very sweet and romantic now. Its like i have lost that sweet part of me forever along with my 'Ex'. Anyways, whats gone is gone! amd i am married to another man now - A marriage that is devoid of much emotions. My husband loves me very much and i am being a very dutiful loyal wife to him.

The problem is, everytime my husband uses sweeet words to me, or tries to hug/kiss me, i am reminded of my Ex. Though i am over my Ex and i DONT WANT to go back to him, i am just reminded of him, and i feel very guilty for that. And also i am still worried whether my EX is safe and sound and happy. I am a very moral person and I feel that i am cheating on my husband, My husband doesn't deserve me. I just wish i had a clean past for someone as good as my husband. But at the same time, i am only able to be a very good loyal wife to him, BUT JUST NOT ROMANTIC. I feel bad for my husband that i am not able to be romantic to him. I guess he is feeling sad.. but i don't know what to do. I can't FAKE ROMANCE RIGHT?? Its like i am living like a machine!.. plsssss help. i don't know what to doooo....!"

[Gemini54]

Your 'close female friend' is cheating on her husband.

He married her, I assume, in good faith believing that she loved him.

She married him on the rebound while her heart was still with someone else.

She thinks about someone else when they make love. She worries about his welfare.

She is not over her Ex. She is not moral.

She needs to be truthful, firstly to herself and then to her husband.

She needs to say, I married you under false pretences. I'm in love with someone else.

Tell this to your 'close female friend'.