[annonamous girl]

Hi I am a 19 year old female, I first had sex at 16 and did not like it, I understand the first time is never usually good so this did not worry me. I have had sex 7 times but during I can't seem to enjoy it, I have never had an orgasm and even though I really want it at first as soon as I start, I don't like it. Is there something really wrong with me? I am worried that I will never enjoy sex, how long does it take before its good. My mind wanders during which I know means I am obviously not interested, I don't know what to do?

[Fr_Chuck]

How much fore play, do you have a organism when you pleasure yourself, explain to the boy what you enjoy

[annonamous girl]

The last time I had sex there was a lot of fore play which got me very aroused and really wanting it, but then, again, as soon as intercourse started it was like I wasn't interested. I do get orgasms myself, which doesn't seem right to me. And I don't even enjoy that after wards I feel wrong. Dirty.

[JoeCanada76]

Why do you feel wrong and dirty. The only way to share what you like with others is by exploring and enjoying your own body.

Many women do not have orgasms through just plain intercourse. Just does not happen usually.

Practice and more practice.

[Fr_Chuck]

Thus the issue if you feel it is wrong or dirty, you can not enjoy it.

Have your partner do exactly whqt you do, and don't stop till you have one, then you have sex.

[artlady]

If you have not already done so ,you need to bring yourself to orgasm by masturbation.There are many sites that will instruct you if you don't know how to do it.

Once you know your body,you will be better prepared to show your partner what you like and what you don't.
Don't be embarrassed to do so.If you are open enough to get naked and share such intimacy,talking should be very easy.

Maybe,you have just had so so partners.In which case,again,tell them what you like and ask them what they like.Everyone is not the same.

[ordinaryguy]

I do get orgasms myself, which doesnt seem right to me. and i dont even enjoy that after wards i feel wrong. dirty.

If it feels wrong and dirty to give yourself an orgasm, it isn't too surprising that you don't have one during intercourse. You need to understand the underlying assumptions and beliefs you have that cause you feel that sex is dirty, and change them. If you can't do that for yourself, get help from a qualified counselor. You may still have trouble reaching climax during intercourse, as many women do, but that doesn't mean you can't have good sex, with plenty of orgasms, however they come about. The key is to learn how to let yourself be fully engaged, in-the-moment, and enthusiastic. Ambivalence, guilt and self-doubt will kill it every time.

[loversbestgirl]

Are you by chance lesbian?

[Ash123]

No need to rush it.
You may feel like sex is an obligation right now and something you'd rather
Do with someone you love...
Take your time.

Describe your relationship with your mother and father - and sisters and brothers (if you have any) if you want me to weigh in a bit more on this... For now, don't worry too much.

Best

A

[IWHO]

My mind wanders during which i know means i am obviously not interested, i dont know what to do?

If your mind wanders and you know you are obviously not interested, then maybe you should wait until you find a partner that you truly love... for me, I have to be with a person that I love or think I love to enjoy it... I can't just do it to do it... if my mind and heart are not involved, then nothing happens... no matter how much foreplay...

[ordinaryguy]

if my mind and heart are not involved, then nothing happens

Yesss... Nothing GOOD, anyway!

[smoothy]

Sounds to me like you aren't finding the right guy... You might think he is Mr. OK, but not Mr. Right based on your semireluctance. Now there might be a bit more to it as well.

Any past abuse issues etc?