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anika_ · May 8, 2009, 09:04 PM

Ok long story short me and this particular ex broke up and got back together like 5 times. I loved him very much but he treated me like crap. The last time we broke up was about a year and a half ago..

Since then Ive had another relationship for about a year. ( which ended a while ago). Anyway me and this ex have been friends all throughout this.. But about 4months ago we had an argument where he said "he doesnt need or want anything from me and that I should remember that".. He has said really REALLY bad stuff to me before but this was just the final straw and so I never replied to any of his texts again.. Even though he has apologised since then.

Sooo last night I saw him when I was out and we talked a little.. He has txt me 3 times since then asking why I'm ignoring him etc...

I'm just not sure if I should reply to him?? I feel bad for not replying but my life is fine without him now and feel like he should just stay in the past.. Plus he said he doesn't need or want anything from me so why try and keep in touch now... Any comments are welcome.. :) Should I reply or not?

Triysle · May 8, 2009, 09:09 PM

To answer your question:

Nope. I shouldn't need to explain this. You gave all the reasons in your post already.

~ Tee

Pokerface5 · May 8, 2009, 09:11 PM

No... he told you he didn't need anything from you, so that's your answer. He doesn't need your text :)

anika_ · May 9, 2009, 12:09 AM

Thanks! Yeah exactly he doesn't need anything from me apparently do why does he care if I stay in touch with him or not.. I'm just going to ignore him

Gemini54 · May 9, 2009, 12:36 AM

Yep, ignoring him is the way to go. He's just trying to get a reaction from you.

talaniman · May 9, 2009, 04:52 AM

Don't reply, eventually he will get the hint, and leave you alone.

roxypox · May 9, 2009, 05:59 AM

Ignore him, like you said, you're life is fine without him and he doesn't need anything from you.

nitelight198073 · May 9, 2009, 06:12 AM

Hun do not stress over this he is not worth your time or energy he has hurt you too much in the past don't let it continue

adam_89 · May 9, 2009, 06:17 AM

Sometimes the best thing to do is to let go. It sounds like you have your answers.

makapuu · May 9, 2009, 05:13 PM

No, you should not reply to his text message. You saw him last night and now he has text messaged you three times asking you why you are ignoring him? It sounds like he is desperate for female attention of any kind, and since you loved him when he treated you like crap... maybe he wants to treat you like crap again.

anika_ · May 9, 2009, 06:20 PM

Yeah you guys are right.. I haven't replied! It took me a looong time to get over him and I don't see any point in talking to him now. He made his choice a long time ago and now he has to live with it.

Ok so another dilemma haha another ex text me last night (I only have 3 bdw) confessing his love for me.. It has been 2 years since me and this one have been broken up and we went out for about 4 years.. we were supposed to get married but I ended it for ex number 2 who this thread is about.

So last night he said he still loves me and no one is ever going to love me the way he does etc etc but I just don't know what to say? I haven't replied but I feel kind of guilty.. I want to reply and say something but what??

I can see the situation from both sides and don't want to hurt him more so is it just better to not reply or reply but maybe change the subject?

talaniman · May 9, 2009, 06:27 PM

You don't have to do anything, but heal at your own pace, in your own way, and whomever has other things for you to consider, can wait until you feel like it.

susangpyp · May 9, 2009, 06:32 PM

Definitely don't reply to these rethreads. It's just a good policy to have. Two years later someone decides they love you? A bit slow on the uptake there bub. No Thanks.

You only want someone who is man enough to know his own heart and go for what he wants. These confused boys are a dime a dozen. Let them spin themselves into a tizzy... without you. You have better things to do than take part in their drama.

If it's dead, bury it.

anika_ · May 9, 2009, 06:41 PM

Yeah OK I won't reply.. I am over them anyway.. (you can read my other thread if you want lol)

I just don't want to be rude by not replying.. because I put myself in their shoes and I'd hate it if someone I cared about didn't reply.. But I suppose when its over its over and you got to move on

ajGambino · May 9, 2009, 06:47 PM

Originally Posted by anika_

when its over its over and you gotta move on

You said it. Do not reply, you do not owe anything to anyone. Seems like you're a kind hearted person but keep in mind that it is your life and no matter what happens in it, make the decisions that'll make YOU do better and be better.

susangpyp · May 9, 2009, 06:57 PM

Originally Posted by anika_

Yeah ok I wont reply.. I am over them anyway..(you can read my other thread if you want lol)

I just dont wanna be rude by not replying..cuz I put myself in their shoes and I'd hate it if someone I cared about didnt reply.. But I suppose when its over its over and you gotta move on

You cannot set a boundary and take care of someone else's feelings at the same time. And here, you have to set a boundary. Don't worry about being rude. This isn't about being rude, it's about taking care of you.

talaniman · May 10, 2009, 06:47 AM

Originally Posted by anika_

I just don't want to be rude by not replying.. because I put myself in their shoes and I'd hate it if someone I cared about didn't reply

I think its rude to contact someone out of the blue, and profess a love that's been dead for sometime.

Survivor07 · May 10, 2009, 07:49 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman

I think its rude to contact someone out of the blue, and profess a love thats been dead for sometime.

Yes, Tal, it is rude.

Having had this happen to me, I know how rude it is.

You've moved on. Who does he think he is to just stick his emotions in your face after two years?

Don't reply. You owe nothing to any of these men. They're looking for attention. They'll have to text someone else.

anika_ · May 10, 2009, 11:45 AM

No it hasn't been 2 years since we've talked.. We have been friends but he has recently moved to another city and has been wanting us to have a long term relationship etc. But yeah he has pretty much never really moved on even though he has dated others he always breaks up with them and then tries to get back together with me.. Its just frustrating because I have told him many many times that I can't get back together so I just don't know what to say anymore..

talaniman · May 10, 2009, 01:59 PM

Say NO, or ignore him, that simple, but don't let him stir up those old feelings in you. Why make his shortcomings your problem?