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    stephygirl1989's Avatar
    stephygirl1989 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 15, 2009, 08:40 PM
    Too much anger, sadness mixed emotions
    I'm suppose to get married July 31, 2010 and if things continue to go this way I doubt this day will ever come. Not meaning I will kill myself I'm not suicidal but I don't think my fiancé will stick around that long if I can't manage to pull myself back together. July 9 2008 my daughter was born the night I got release from the hospital due to the birth of my beautiful baby girl my father passed away. Now that was something I held to my heart very badly when it happened. I had finally over come the death of my dad when suddenly my little nefew that was 26 days old passed away... although I was still having a hard time I was getting better. I just recently found out that I am losing my godmother, that's it's just a matter of time before she goes. I'm always frustrated and angry but I'm not angry towards everyone. The only person that sees my anger is my fiancé. I've tried to talk to him but it doesn't work. When I was trying to get over the death of my dad and was talking to him he told me he couldn't do anything he's gone he's gone. Although that is the truth he is gone but I needed an approce a bit easier than that. Now I don't talk to no one, I hold in all my hurt, I always cry when I'm alone but then I blow up on my fiancé with every little word he tells me. I need some advice. I know I can't bring them back or prevent anyone from dying I know I got to move on but every time I do something else happens and brings it all back.. I just don't want to reck my relationship because I've lost loved ones and I try so hard to not get angry at him but nothing seems to work. I need a bit of help
    pixiegurl's Avatar
    pixiegurl Posts: 54, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Apr 15, 2009, 08:58 PM

    I think that you are going through a very very difficult time in your life and that perhaps you need to seek some professional help. A family counsellor or your doctor will be able to help you. You shouldn't feel like you have to carry all of your pain on your own. There are people out there that will help you and show you that you can move on from the terrible things that have happened. Perhaps you should try talking calmly to your partner about seeking help and get some reassurance from him that he is going to stick by you while you go through this tough time.

    I have lost my mother, father, brother, all my grandparents and many of my other family members in recent years and I am only 19. I can assure you that you can get through this and if you ever need anyone to talk to I'm just an email away. I know I am quite younger than you, but I empathise with you and I want you to know that you are not alone!

    Talk to your family doctor. They will definitely be able to help you and get you some bereavement counselling. Your anger at your fiancé is just your built up emotions because you don't know how to process them anymore.

    Be strong, there is hope.
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Apr 15, 2009, 08:59 PM

    I am very sorry for all the loss and heartache that is happening to you.
    This may not all be related to grief.You could be suffering from postpartum depression.I think it would be wise to see your gynecologist and discuss how you are feeling.

    There is also bereavement counseling and that may be helpful to you as well.Many communities have free group therapy for people who are experiencing your type of problem.Call your local mental health facility.

    It is nothing to be ashamed of that you are feeling overwhelmed and the best thing to do is to seek help from people who understand the process of grief and the healing that needs to be done.

    As an aside,please know that your loved ones would never want you to be in this pain.Know that they are always with you in your heart and you must remember them in life and cherish what you had ,not what you have lost.

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