[Ceoli 1]

Dear reader,

My boy-friend broke up with me a couple of weeks ago and I am having a real hard time dealing with it because I now this time is for real. We were together for 3 years and supposedly very much in love and always together having a lot of fun, when things were good we were the happiest couple ever, but any time we got in to fights he claim not to like me and even not to love me any more. He kept braking up with me often after a fight, but I always managed to turn things around. Long speeches about our great love and how we belong together and so on. Our biggest issue was commitment, He has been married 3 times and wants nothing to do with marriage any more. However when we met the story was different, it was something that he would most definitely consider he claimed, but after a while in the relationship he made it clear to me that he would not get married again. I broke up with him last year because of it, but took him back after a couple of weeks. I realized that I loved him way too much to put my marriage desire before him. However, he was supposed to meet my half way, my request was for him to at least give me some type of a promise wring and he accepted. It was 6 month later and it never happened, when I asked him about it, his answer was that he was not comfortable doing that. The relationship has been very unstable after that, but still enjoying each other very much. I have been feeling very insecure about our relationship and was giving a hard time about things that where not very important to fight about. He got fed up with it and he broke up with me a couple of weeks ago. I tried to do my same old trick, "baby we love each other, lets make this work, I know we can, we belong together" and so on, but this time it did not work, not matter what I say or did there was no turning back from him. I still had some hope as his stuff was still at home, but a week later he sent me an email telling me that he was coming by to pick up his things and he would drop my off. (We were living together, my place and his boat on weekends) After I received this email, I knew that I need it o accept it and let it be. When he came by his things were already packed, we had a nice talked, he Cried like a baby, gave each other a really good long hug and have not call him or heard from him since then. I am trying to be strong, but I am dying without him. I miss my fun weekends with him, I miss everything about him. I would do anything to get him back to him. But at the same time, I know we have different desires and dreams for the future. What should I do?

[talaniman]

Your still very much grieving to have the good comfortable things back from the relationship, but that won't happen.

Its going to take a while, and some very hard work on your part, before you are comfortable with your new single status, and able to slowly rebuild, your life, and regroup from your loss. It's a painful and long process.

Read the stickies at the beginning of this forum for some good insight into how others have dealt with similar situations as yours. We all have gone through exactly the same thing as you are, so they will be most helpful.

There is a link in my signature, if you have trouble finding it.