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mrsmurphy082909 · Apr 7, 2009, 08:17 PM

My daughter is 3 now and her father had been in and out of her life for the first year, and it's now gradually tapered off, he hasn't seen her in almost a year. He was paying the most minimal child suppot, quitting jobs before they filed with his employeer, and also getting paid under the table. He also been doing meth. In Nov. when he finally called after months to see her, I said that he was welcomed in her life but he needed to get off drugs, and go to rehab, seek counseling, and become more finacially supportive and be more consistent. (Not seeing her once every six months.) He did no of this, and in fact lied about doing some of it and is now back in jail for drug use and violating his parole. In the mean time I had started dating a guy who took my daughter as her own and who she now calls dad. He has been everything a father should be and wants to adopt her. We are getting married in four months and want to know what are our rights to terminate her biological fathers rights, and what we would need to prove to do so. He will obivously not be paying child support in prison, is this abandonment since he choose his actions to get himself there?

Synnen · Apr 8, 2009, 03:44 AM

Get a lawyer. Unless you can PROVE that he is a danger to her, you're not likely to be able to terminate his rights.

You also need to be married for a specific time in many states before you can start this process--you need to speak with a lawyer about what the laws in YOUR state are.

In the end, you can try to entice the biological father with child support ending when the adoption is finalized, but you cannot FORCE anyone to give up parental rights, and generally the only reason a COURT would sever parental rights is if the person is a danger to their child.

ScottGem · Apr 8, 2009, 07:25 AM

No this is not abandonment. But his criminal record MIGHT enable you to terminate his rights.

What you need is a lawyer. The lawyer will need to prepare the adoption petition. So you need to consult one. The lawyer can then tell you what requirements you have to meet to adopt and what your chances are of getting the father's rights terminated.