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aidanbmom21 · Jan 14, 2009, 12:52 PM

Hi I have a 20 month old named Aidan. He has never slept well but it was because he suffered fromc hronic ear infections. Well we got ear tubes and he slept beautifully for about a week. Now he will go to sleep fine and do good for about 3-4 hours but then he wakes up and wants his bottle even if its just for one little sip. Sometimes he wakes up screaming or he'll scream but still be asleep. Usually its easy to comfort him but I think he is having nightmares. I just don't know how to get him to sleep through the night. I know nothing raumatic has ever happened to him because I am with him 24/7 and I've never allowed anyone to babysit him. Also he doesn't watch TV so I can't imagine what may be scaring him. I am wondering why he will only sleep for about 4 hours and he never seems tired. He is up at 6 am daily takes a nap from 10-11:30 and is in bed about 8:30/9 oclcock. Please help his dad and I are exhausted

Tranquillity · Jan 18, 2009, 10:30 AM

Hi
Going on experience with my own children, I would say try not to let him have such a long nap, then try and put him to bed at earlier say 6.30 or 7pm. And don't worry about Aidan getting up at 6.00am both my kids still get up at 6.00 or 6.30am and they are 7 years and 9 years. By putting him to bed earlier and less nap he should sleep better, let me know how you get on.

Jake2008 · Jan 18, 2009, 11:16 AM

Sleep time has got to be the most challenging of all tasks with young children. At a year and a half, they understand bedtime, but they don't understand why they have to!

Do you watch Nanny911? That is almost a constant 'correction' she makes with families.

How do you know that he wakes up screaming because of nightmares? Could there be another ear infection going on here, or some other as yet unknown problem?

Also about the bottle, as long as it is available to him, he will expect it. Maybe time to get him off the bottle completely. When he adjusts to not having the bottle, be careful that you don't provide a sippy cup in the middle of the night- sort of defeats the purpose.

As long as he's being rewarded for waking up, he will keep waking up.

If you are sure that there is nothing physically wrong, then I think it just becomes a habit that you have to break. Interrupted sleep for the whole family isn't good, all the way around.

this8384 · Jan 20, 2009, 04:26 PM

It's very possible that your son simply knows you'll come into his room when he's screaming. Do you let him cry for awhile and then eventually go in or is it immediate? Is he actually crying tears or just yelling? At 20 months, he shouldn't need a bottle in the middle of the night. Sometimes the hardest part is just letting him cry it out.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 20, 2009, 05:23 PM

Let me see, I guess why no TV, there are many educational shows that can be of a help to children

And at times not wanting to sound too off here, but a parent 24/7 with no breaks, at times there is a dependency. Do you and the child's father never go out, of if not with father, you never go anywhere without the child??

You need a parents night or day out sometimes.

At 20 months the bottle should have been gone long ago for many reasons.

And in general if there is nothing wrongyou let them cry at times.

aidanbmom21 · Jan 20, 2009, 10:54 PM

We never go anywhere without him. He was 3 months early so I have hard the hardest time letting go plus he freaks out if we try to leave. My hubby wants to try our first night out this weekend. OH and update we have been bottle free for 2 days now so that's good news.

this8384 · Jan 21, 2009, 07:48 AM

Originally Posted by aidanbmom21

We never go anywhere without him. He was 3 months early so I have hard the hardest time letting go plus he freaks out if we try to leave. My hubby wants to try our first night out this weekend. OH and update we have been bottle free for 2 days now so thats good news.

Congrats on the bottle breaking! :)

I know it's hard to let go, but it's only going to get harder. It's not fair to you, your husband or your son that he's completely dependent on you. Good luck this weekend :)

gobe · Jan 22, 2009, 01:15 PM

Hello I have a 2 years and 5 months old. He is a great kid but I never teach him to sleep. He goes to the bed at 8.30 -9 weak up at 6 at 7 he has to be on the daycare (working parents) Around 12 at night he weak up every single night. My fault. He was sick a lot before (2 surgery), and I started to sleep with him just to monitor him. Right now he is a healthy boy with a bad hobby... so I guess my answer to you is that we did something wrong. You never taught him to sleep neater did I. Sorry about my english

aidanbmom21 · Jan 22, 2009, 02:30 PM

I think I found my answer. I bought him a twin size bed and set it up in my room. Well anyway I think he just does not like a crib mattress because the first night he slept all the way through the night so last night we moved the bed to his room and I was expecting him to cry well he didn't. He went right to sleep and slept till 6 am. I think we have a solution he just likes the feel of a real bed. I am so excited I just hope it lasts.

gobe · Jan 23, 2009, 06:23 AM

I'm glad for you. We are still suffering I guess for a while. I talk to him about being a big boy or a baby and in daytime he says he is a big boy but when bedtime comes he tells me I'm mommy's baby I'm sleeping with mommy. What can I do he is smarter than I am :0) We're planning to make him his own room we are painted all ready just need some kid furniture than we will throw out the bed where my husband sleep than no more choice for him that's the plan. Good luck to you!

LAMBCHOPS · Jan 28, 2009, 07:03 PM

I have a 2-and-a-half year old son and I can understand your frustrations with the whole sleeping thing. Kids are weird... their 'sleeping style' changes all the time. Sometimes it's teeth, sometimes their sick, sometimes it's nightmares, then they start climbing out of their bed... there's always something! There have been times I have asked myself: WILL I EVER HAVE A GOOD NIGHT SLEEP AGAIN??

Anyway, at 20 months, there's really no reason to be hungry during the night. I know it's really hard, but try letting him cry. Just cover your ears and remind yourself that he's fine. It also helps to teach your son "dark outside--it's night time" before he goes to bed, and "light outside--it's morning time." That way, you can talk to him about it every night, "Mommy will come back when it's light outside." Don't worry, even though it's horrible hearing your baby cry, if you know he really doesn't need anything, don't feel guilty about not going in. He won't feel abandoned or traumatized. Kids do all sorts of weird stuff when they sleep...

Also, I think it's fine to give your son a bottle (that's your choice completely), but it's best to do it at a predictable time. Routines work really well for babies. They're happier and more relaxed when they know what to expect.

When they start telling you "No!" and wanting to do everything themselves... that'll be your next chapter ;) have fun

gobe · Jan 29, 2009, 07:22 AM

Hello all, I agree with, lambchops" but no bottle, bad idea, leather on you have to take the bottle away and again struggling with one bad hobby. Not to mention bottle is not good for the teeth

jillrenee15 · Feb 1, 2009, 12:24 AM

Good for you on getting rid of the bottle!! It was past time I think. My son is 2 1/2 and still wakes up once or twice a week screaming, usually around 11 or midnight. I do get right up and go in there, because I've learned if I don't catch it early, he'll really be awake and upset. He's actually still asleep when he's sitting up in bed crying! I just have to rub his back and shush him a few seconds, then lay him back down. He turns over and is out like a light again. I think it is common for toddlers to start having night terrors around the age of 2. They start to have an imagination of their own and their little brains keep working and thinking and growing at night too. I think it is that or he just wants to know mom or dad is around if he really needs us. Kids are weird...

hoagie26 · Feb 8, 2009, 08:33 PM

My wife and I have twin boys that had and still have this problem and the solution I came up with is once I put my kids to bed we let them cry until they go to sleep. It sucks hearing them cry but it does work.

Another thing I do is put soft music on like mood scapes at a very low volume and now they go right to sleep

TabbyKitteh · Feb 8, 2009, 09:16 PM

I have a 16 month old and though she was always a good sleeper every once in a while she goes to sleep at weird hours and wake up during the night screaming and what not.

I was told by her doctor that nightmares are made by the child's developing mind and not always because they saw something bad happen.

What I had to do was force her to stay awake during the day and train her to take a nap around a certain time.

Another way would be to let him run around and have lots of fun to the point that when it is time for him to go to sleep, he won't wake up until the next day.

Letting them cry helps too. And A Nice warm bottle or sippy cup of Milk does the trick.

I tend to do a combination of all these ideas.. lol

aidanbmom21 · Feb 8, 2009, 09:31 PM

Last night he woke up every 2 hours screaming and I'd run over but he was still asleep. My mom says I did the same thing when I was his age for about 4 very long months but I eventually just stopped. I have hope he'll grow out of it.

TabbyKitteh · Feb 8, 2009, 09:33 PM

Every child has this thing they do when they are sleep.

My daughter does this thing when she takes my hand and moves her fingers around my knuckle bone making it pop. Weirdest thing.
That or she pinches me or plays with my hair.

I think the screaming thing is just left over energy from the day coming out.