[melanie90]

Hey,
I've been thinking a lot lately. My last relationship lasted two years. I'm quite young and I was raised in a conservative family so it took a while for me to accept having sex with my boyfriend. We broke up shortly after though (for other reasons) but we only had sex about 5 times?
My problem is that I'm afraid of having sex again. Everyone around me, even my best friends have all slept with at least 5 guys and they always talk about all of the things they do. And now, most guys expect you to put out quite fast and to be up for a lot.
I'm just scared of my own inexperience. The worse thing is on top of it, that for some reason, people tend to think I'm quite experienced, because I come across as very confident (and it doesn't help that I have a curvy figure either)...
It's stopping me from dating the guys that ask me out (to be fair I choose them carefully anyway because I wouldn't want to be with a guy for whom that would be an issue) and I get even more freaked out when everyone around me seems to only be talking about sex and the things they've done!

I'm not sure whehter I have a problem, whether there is anything to do about it but it's eating at me.

[Bluerose]

Try not to get too far ahead of yourself. Relax, accept a date and simply have some fun. Take it slow, get to know the person a little better before you start to worry about the sex. You can always say that you just got out of a bad relationship and you would like to take things a bit slower. If he's an okay guy he'll be okay with that. Get to know each other a bit and everything else will just fall into place.

As for the stuff your friends have been saying, friends have been known to exaggerate quite a bit. Take care of you and don't listen to too much gossip. Try reading some good books on the subject instead.

[KBC]

You have a whole lifetime to 'get experienced'

If they(your peers who sleep around) were to say"I jumped off that bridge and it was AWESOME" would you feel like you needed to experience this also?

Think about this.By not having sex with multiple men,you can officially say;

1) Your chances of getting an infectious disease has decreased by?

2) Your chances of getting pregnant have decreased by?

3) Your learning 'to be more in bed' has yet to be discovered... Whats wrong with that?

Do you ever read the relationship posts,just at random?Look at the wives,who after 5-8 years into a marriage just don't see the reason to be with their mates any longer?"I am not 'in love' with him any longer"OR "Why is sex not important to him any longer?"

If this is something you want to experience while still young,go for it.BUT as you stated,your from a conservative family and those morals(vs. peer pressure) are at odds,as they should be.

My opinion, stay with your feelings,your on the right track,and don't fall prey to the peer pressure ploys,you only think they are enjoying their promiscuity,you don't need to experience it yourself,to be like them,just to prove something,do you?

In time,MR. Right will be there,and he won't have expectations,he will be teacher and student in the bedroom.That's the truth.

Hope this helped,

KBC

[Choux]

You don't have to do anything you feel confused and uncertain about...

There is no reason for you to throw away your healthy and tender sexual impulses and feelings on lecherous high school guys who can ruin you for a long time if you hook up with them. :)