[tobybeebee]

I broke up with my b/r 5 weeks ago after 8 years long distance relationship, because I'm not ready to commit.

Right after the breakup, I felt just as hurt, my heart aches, I couldn't get over him. I miss him very much. After a few days being aparted, I realize how much I do love him and I really want him back in my life. I thought about our relationship seriously and have decided that I'm ready to make my first move which is to find a job and move to where he lives. I phoned him up and we had a long talk... I apologized to him and let him know how I felt and my decision to move to where he is, I wanted to save our relationship because I love him very much, and I know he loves still love me. But he kept telling me that he's not sure if we should get back together although he still love me very much.

Since the breakup, he never calls me, or text message, or email me anymore like he used to do. During the first two weeks, I called him up and we talked a few times about our relationship, his answer was still the same. No matter how I begged him and cried, still the same answer. I felt so hopless, so I just gave up and didn't contact him for about a week. After one week of no contact, he called me and asked me how I was doing, we talked for about 1/2 hour, but we didn't get into any discussion about our relationship. Next day, I called him up, and asked him if there is any chance of us getting back together, and I told him I wanted an answer. I think what's holding him back is our age difference (he's 20 years older than me), and we are thousands miles away from each other. Although I told him that I would move over there to be with him, I think what really worries him is our age difference. He's afraid that when he reaches 60, I would only be 40, what if he dies first, I'll be by myself living in painful memories... he asked me not to pressure him to give me an awswer, he doesn't want to say it me that there is no chance either, he said still loves me very much, he's very hurt and painful now, he said that he still needs time to think it over.

I'm not sure what he really means that he still needs time to think over. Is it really over ? Or is there still a chance. I just want to have answer, either yes or no, and move on with my life. I'm feeling very painful right now and don't know what to do. In the meantime, I have decided no contact with him until he makes his decision. Please give me some advice as to what to do, and what does he means ?

[talaniman]

Ask Me Help Desk - Search Results

Several things here, firstly are you ready to commit after 8 years of thinking about it? If not forget it!

Secondly, why the heck do you think you can break up, change your mind, and expect him to just fall in line?? He ain't no YO-YO!

If that were me, no way would I even consider it with out some changes or a firm commitment from you.

Still trying to figure out why you would be so wishy washy after 8 freakin years??

What's up with that??

[Chey1221]

Well If he still manages to find the time to call you... If he is still trying to be there like he was before... Then things would work out.. I've had plenty of guys pull the well I need time to see if this is what I want line... and I always waited.. some of the time it was worth the wait. It was the times when not much seemed to change between me and the guy after he said he needed time, that I knew we'd be okay... Because if they can't back off and leave you be.. Than its easy to say that in this point of their life they can't go without thinking about you.. and as long as they are thinking about you, you are still in his heart... So if he isn't letting the "us" slip away then you'll be fine.. Otherwise don't chase him.. If he still cares then he'll come back... But I think the best thing to do would to be straight up ask him if he still wants to be with you.