[holdingin]

Ok, so I'm sorry if this is under the wrong section:confused:
But I really need to get some answers.
So I'm 17 and on July 31st I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend.
I am on birth control,however still worried.
I did get my next period on time,but I can admit it was a day or two shorter,slightly lighter.
About 2 months after this I decided to take a pregnancy test,just to ease my mind,and it did turn out as negative.
I was pretty calm about this for a while however I saw my boyfriend about a week ago and when we were... "fooling around" we noticed bleeding.
And it hasn't stopped since I'm in the middle of my pack of because so this should NOT be happening.:(
Anyway my boyfriend has been doing great with trying to calm me down and assuring me that I'm not and if I am he has an entire plan to support me and the child.
But I'm not ready to drop out of high school and have a kid.
I had a Pap done maybe two weeks ago and she didn't seem to notice anything,
However I did not mention I was scared of being pregnant.
I guess long story short I'm not sure if I am being paranoid or if I have something to worry about.
I tried to make another doctors appointment but the only female doctor in our small town can't fit me in for two months.

[southerngalps]

Well, if you are bleeding you are probably not pregnant. I wouldn't stress about it too much. You are being repsonsible by being on birth control and if you still feel stressed about it, maybe you should use a condom as well. Double the protection.

[ScottGem]

i'm not ready to drop out of high school and have a kid..

Why didn't you think about that BEFORE you became sexually active. No form of birth control is 100% so no one whould engage in sexual intercourse, protected or not, unless they are emotionally and financially prepared to have a child.

OK, lecture over. Go get yourself a home pregnancy test and use them and test yourself over the next few weeks.

And tell your boyfriend you are ready for intercourse and you won't do it anymore until you are ready.

[Alty]

Sex=pregnancy, that's the bottom line, so yes, it's possible that you are pregnant and just having break through bleeding. It's also possible that you are having a miscarriage. It's possible that you're just off this month. Are you getting what I'm saying, there are lots of possibilities, and we cannot give you the accurate one, only a doctor can.

I'd love to be able to tell you that everything is okay, but I can't, I also can't tell you whether you're pregnant, you can't even tell us and you have the one thing we'd need in order to give you a diagnosis, your body.

Go to the doctor if you're worried, or do what Scott suggested.

Also, remember, every time you have sex, even if you use all the contraception out there, there is always the possibility of pregnancy. The only form of birth control that is 100% effective is abstinence.

Good luck.

[southerngalps]

And tell your boyfriend you are ready for intercourse and you won't do it anymore until you are ready.

Okay, I'm sure this was a type "o". What is wrong with saying she is responsible?? Do you know how many teens have sex these days?? If it is going to happen... then she is doing the responsible thing. I am not really condoning either. It's nice to hear that someone is being smart about something that they shouldn't be doing.

[ScottGem]

Whoops, yes that was a typo, I meant not ready for intercourse. By telling her she is being responsible or suggesting using a condom as well, you re condoning being sexually active.

Yes, I'm aware that many teens are sexually active and that teen pregnancy rates are starting to rise again. That makes it even MORE important that we let teens know that its NOT OK.

I'm not naïve. I know its unlikely they will remain totally chaste. But there are ways to give pleasure to your partner without riskng pregnancy.

[Alty]

How is using birth control smart? I will say that it's "smarter" but smart?

Southerngalps, you do realize that even with the pill, a condom and another form of birth control, you can still get pregnant? Every time you have sex even "protected" sex, you run the risk of pregnancy. So, if you aren't ready for a child, don't have sex.

I realize that asking teens to abstain from sex is a pipe dream, heck, I'm hardly one to preach, I was notoriously promiscuous as a teen, but, times have changed.

She is being as responsible as she can be, sadly that isn't enough to guarantee that pregnancy won't occur.

Sex=pregnancy, I can't say it enough. You could use every type of birth control on the market at the same time and there's still a chance that you will get pregnant. If you aren't ready for a child, don't have sex, it's really that simple.

[southerngalps]

You know, there are so many posts about a teen being pregnant and NOT using birth control and everyone always gives them the "you shouldn't be having sex at all, you're just a kid" quote. At 17, you are a senior in high school (depending). You are coming into the world as your own person. This will happen. This is 2008. Do you know how many teens give birth to babies?? this is not right,however, she is being very responsible. YES, the only 100% form of birth control is abstinence for teens AND adults. I am sorry if I offended anyone by my first comment. I should have ellaborated.

[southerngalps]

Yes, I'm aware that many teens are sexually active and that teen pregnancy rates are starting to rise again. That makes it even MORE important that we let teens know that its NOT OK.

Very understandable. I just feel that pushing them to not do it makes it worse and strongly suggesting protected sex will be more efficient now in this day and age.

[ScottGem]

Yes at 17 one is just .coming into their own person. They will have several years to determine who they are. But having a baby means they don't get to do that. Instead they become a mom and that defines their life.

[southerngalps]

Yes :)

[Alty]

you know, there are so many posts about a teen being pregnant and NOT using birth control and everyone always gives them the "you shouldn't be having sex at all, you're just a kid" quote. at 17, you are a senior in high school (depending). You are coming into the world as your own person. This will happen. This is 2008. Do you know how many teens give birth to babies???? this is not right,however, she is being very responsible. YES, the only 100% form of birth control is abstinence for teens AND adults. i am sorry if i offended anyone by my first comment. i should of ellaborated.

I understand that, I've been there done that, I got lucky, no pregnancy and one STD that was easily cleared up, others are not that lucky.

At 17 you are not mature enough, or financially secure enough to raise a child, not unless you have a trust fund or rich parents that are going to help you out.

The fact is that more and more teens are having babies that they cannot support, very rarely does the father of the child stick around or pay child support. Most often the teen is left by herself to raise a child on very little income, welfare is usually the only way out and that isn't a way out at all. Why should tax payers pay for 5 mintues of pleasure?

You didn't offend me, not at all, I understand what you are saying and I realize that telling teens not to have sex isn't going to work, but something's got to give, because even those that are acting responsibliy by taking birth control and using condoms are still getting pregnant. There is not birth control method that works 100%.

Question. If someone put a gun in your hand and said to you, they're a 98.7% chance that you won't get killed if you place this gun to your head and pull the trigger, would you do it? After all 98.7% is pretty good odds. Would you risk your life? Personally, I wouldn't unless I had a 100% guarantee. :)

[southerngalps]

ANSWER: no, I wouldn't try the gun scenario. :)

[Alty]

I didn't think you would, most people wouldn't, but that's what everyone does when they rely on birth control to prevent pregnancy. The pill is 98.7%, the condom more like 80% (if used correctly which most people don't). I wouldn't play with those odds. ;)

The saddest thing is that most teens today have absolutely no idea what can cause pregnancy or STD's. Some teens still think that the pull out method works, one girl on AMHD asked if she could get pregnant by giving oral sex. What is happening to sex education, obviously someone dropped the ball somewhere.

So, when I see a teen on AMHD I always tell them that only abstinence is 100%, because quite frankly, it is.

I almost feel like we should have a sex ed thread here on AMHD, maybe that would help. Mods, what about it? :)

[J_9]

Okay, my two cents for what it's worth. Nobody considers the physical consequences of teen pregnancy. As a labor and delivery nurse I see it all the time.

For women under the age of approximately 21, the pelvis is not quite mature enough for labor and delivery, thus increasing the risk for emergency C-Section. Once a section always a section these days.

Teens have a higher risk for Pregnancy Induced Hypertension (PIH), which can cause seizures and be fatal if not treated immediately. Treatment is immediate delivery of the baby (section). Now, some teens can go the entire 9 months without having to have a section and can control their blood pressure, but we cannot predict which teens can go the entire time.

Teens have a higher incidence of Gestational Diabetes, which can cause macrosomia (big babies), thus increases the risk of section yet again. Not only that, but this increases the risk of permanent diabetes in the future for the mother and the baby.

As I mentioned earlier... the pelvis. The pelvis is not completely fused until around age 21, so this can cause what is called cephalopelvic disproportion (CPD for short). Meaning that the mother's pelvis is too small for the baby's head to travel through the birth canal. This not only increases the risk of section, but if labor is allowed to continue, the risk of an injury called shoulder dystocia can occur. This is a life threatening situation to the baby that can, and most likely will cause permanent damage to the baby. Whether it be brain damaged due to hypoxia (lack of oxygen) because it takes too long and certain very dangerous maneuvers to get the baby out, or possible permanent damage to the arm or shoulder involved, as well as possible cerebral palsy.

Yes, I am a certified in emergency adolescent deliveries and I have only been a licensed nurse for 4 months. So you can see, I have experienced all of these emergencies and many more when it comes to teen deliveries. The youngest I delivered was a 13 year old.

Now, with that said, teens also have a notorious history of short term relationships. When I say short term, I am talking 3 years or less. Why would a gal want to risk a few hours or minutes of fun only having to raise a baby alone? The guy is NOT going to stick around once the baby is born. It's so much easier to just walk away when the going gets tough, and it does.

I didn't even mention the high incidence of pre-term labor in teens. This causes up to millions of dollars in hospital bills for the baby who must have to have surgery after surgery to keep it alive, months in the hospital in incubators and special medicines to keep it alive. Only then to find out that the preemie may have permanent brain damage.

[holdingin]

OK I knew that when I started having sex that there was a chance that I could get pregnant.
And I have talked to my boyfriend about everything that would happen if I ever got pregnant.

And I made sure that before I started having sex I was as safe as possible.
I've had one partner for the past year,my current boyfriend is my first,for everything.
And I knew he had partners before me but he has checked himself for STD's twice a year since he started.I made sure he did before we stared having sex ourselves.
I was on the pill for a month before we started and we have used a condom every time,except that once.and it was a mistake we both realize that but are ready to take responsibility for our action if the moment calls for it.

I have taken two test,both negative and it's been 11 weeks since that mistake.

I'm sorry but telling me sex is wrong is not going to help in this situation,I respect your opinion but respect mine when I know at least it was with a guy I know will be here for me in the worst situation.

I got my period on time after that day.this bleeding now is what got me back on alert.I have had no sickness,weight gain any other symptoms.

[ScottGem]

and i made sure that before i started having sex i was as safe as possible..

.

Its good that you you tried to minimize the risks as much as possible. However, I go back to what you said in the OP; "i'm not ready to drop out of highschool and have a kid". That says more to me because it was more unguarded than your subsequent post. The fear and worry that is apparent in your OP is clear.

I'm sorry but telling me sex is wrong is not going to help in this situation,i respect your opinion but respect mine when i know at least it was with a guy i know will be here for me in the worst situation.

I don't think you are quite understanding us. We aren't saying sex is wrong. We are saying that if engage in sexual intercourse you need to be ready to have a child. If you aren't then you shouldn't be engaging in intercourse.

[DoulaLC]

Many adults don't fully understand how their bodies work either in regard to reproduction... both men and women!

Teens are going to be more risk takers, it is part of the make-up of the teen brain. No one thinks things will happen to them... it always happens to someone else. It is human nature, but you see it more with younger people.

Does it mean they should be having sex... of course not. If talking about it can cause some to stop and think before even starting, or perhaps even decide to stop after they already have... great... that would be the ideal. For those who will choose to continue, education is vital so they can protect themselves, and their partners, as much as possible.

In regard to the OP... holdingin, it is possibly just breakthrough bleeding, which happens to some women while on the pill. How long have you been on the pill? Some work better for some women than others. Might also be from irritation to the cervix.

If you have used the pill correctly, odds are you aren't pregnant, but as you know there will always be that chance. It's good to hear that you have good communication with your boyfriend and that you both talk about the possible issues that can arrise. Many girls are not as fortunate.

[holdingin]

Many adults don't fully understand how their bodies work either in regard to reproduction....both men and women!!

Teens are going to be more risk takers, it is part of the make-up of the teen brain. No one thinks things will happen to them...it always happens to someone else. It is human nature, but you see it more with younger people.

Does it mean they should be having sex....of course not. If talking about it can cause some to stop and think before even starting, or perhaps even decide to stop after they already have....great....that would be the ideal. For those who will choose to continue, education is vital so they can protect themselves, and their partners, as much as possible.

In regard to the OP.....holdingin, it is possibly just breakthrough bleeding, which happens to some women while on the pill. How long have you been on the pill? Some work better for some women than others. Might also be from irritation to the cervix.

If you have used the pill correctly, odds are you aren't pregnant, but as you know there will always be that chance. It's good to hear that you have good communication with your boyfriend and that you both talk about the possible issues that can arrise. Many girls are not as fortunate.

Thank you it's good to know that someone isn't completely judgmental and trying to help:)
I have been on Yasmin for a little over a year and this has never happened to me before.
As for the irritation thing,it could be possible cause it didn't really start till after my Pap,and it was my first one.
Then when me and my boyfriend were fooling around.
I'm thinking if I was pregnant my doctor wouldn't have noticed something instead of giving me another years worth of my prescription.
My boyfriend says it's probably just stress that's making me over think that I could be pregnant.
And thanks very much I know I'm very lucky to have him.
And unlike most of the girls I know I'm glad I waited around for the right guy.
With him I know if something happens he will always be there for me.
And the child if the situation calls for it.

And in advance I thank you for not trying to judge me too much.
I respect other people's opinion that they don't approve of teenage sex.
But I made sure it was with the right guy.
And even though I know he will be here for me,I'd hate for him to give up his graduating year for me.
It's not that we aren't repaired.I just know how important this year is to him.
Graduating and he is the captain of his Rugby team this year.
I'm proud of him and would hate for that one mistake that one day to cause all that to end for him.:(
I know I kind of blabbed on.
Somewhere in there I got my point across lol

[ScottGem]

Thank you it's good to know that someone isn't completely judgmental and trying to help:)

I have to take exception to this. I think everyone who has responded has tried to help you. No one has been "completely judgemental".

I think you keep missing the point here. I believe you believe you have found the right one. I don't dispute that you may have. I think you are to be commended for waiting until you did and for trying to miminze the risk as much as possible.

But the bottomline is you keep talking about not wanting to be pregnant yet you refuse to take the only step to insure that you don't. I'm not suggesting you give up being intimate with him or pleasuring each other. I'm only suggesting that you not risk getting pregnant.