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    lovelikethis14's Avatar
    lovelikethis14 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 27, 2008, 09:04 AM
    The only way I can get back with my ex is if lose my friend which is his ex friend
    Hi. What should I do?? Me and my ex broke up like a month ago and there were a couple of reasons but the main reason was because of his ex friend. In march like for a week me and his friend were talking but we never did anything.But so I told my ex about it and his ex friend had did it with all of his other girlfriends as well.Also my ex's ex friend was always talking stuff about me to my ex and he would talk stuff about my ex. . So my ex broke up with me and I still love him soooooo much!! But he told me if there was anyway or chance for us to be together I have to stop talking and everything to his ex friend.But his ex friend was my friend too. And I really want to get back with my ex so I did stop talking to him but did I make the right choice.I feel like such a bad person for doing it though.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #2

    Jul 27, 2008, 09:11 AM
    So, he has trust issues. Why? Well, because there was a pattern. You started doing something that in the past has led to his earned distrust in his ex's. Now, you are not them, and he should know that and be able to differentiate that. If he can't get over it. He obviously has trust issues from his past, now that's fine, but you should have known this, and you know where this distrust lies and you walked the line with it. Can you blame him for being skeptical? If you've never done anything to make him distrust you, this isn't a good reason to end the relationship. How long were you two together?
    lovelikethis14's Avatar
    lovelikethis14 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 27, 2008, 09:21 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by lovelikethis14
    Hi. What should i do??? Me and my ex broke up like a month ago and there were a couple of reasons but the main reason was because of his ex friend. In march like for a week me and his friend were talking but we never did anything.But so i told my ex about it and his ex friend had did it with all of his other girlfriends as well.Also my ex's ex friend was always talking stuff about me to my ex and he would talk stuff about my ex. .So my ex broke up with me and i still love him soooooo much!!! But he told me if there was anyway or chance for us to be together i have to stop talking and everything to his ex friend.But his ex friend was my friend too. And i really want to get back with my ex so i did stop talking to him but did i make the right choice.I feel like such a bad person for doing it though.
    We were together for 4 months but we were friends before that.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #4

    Jul 27, 2008, 09:40 AM
    Well, that's a fairly short relationship. You were in the process of gaining his trust, which is the first stage in a relationship. You did something that lost his trust. You obviously knew that this was something that would make him lose trust in you and you did it anyway, you didn't care. Why care now? I would suggest moving on.
    erin7799's Avatar
    erin7799 Posts: 159, Reputation: 32
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    #5

    Jul 27, 2008, 09:58 AM
    Since you did something that made this guy not trust you, then you need to make a choice and be OK with it. It's a tough situation to be in. But if you really want this guy back then you need to do what it takes and that very well may be not talking to this other guy. And you need to be OK with that. But if you're going to resent him for you having to make that choice then you should probably just move on. He has good reason for not wanting you to talk to him. But you need to decide if it's all worth it. And are you going to feel good about your choice?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #6

    Jul 27, 2008, 01:33 PM
    The ex friend has clearly hurt your ex, so I can understand his feelings. The bottom line is, whether you want a b/f, or a friend, who has backstabbed your b/f, and badmouthed you to him. Doesn't sound like a friend to me. Think about it.
    Kevin_s's Avatar
    Kevin_s Posts: 213, Reputation: 51
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    #7

    Jul 27, 2008, 02:44 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    The ex friend has clearly hurt your ex, so I can understand his feelings. The bottom line is, whether or not you want a b/f, or a friend, who has backstabbed your b/f, and badmouthed you to him. Doesn't sound like a friend to me. Think about it.
    Exactly what I was thinking, this Ex-Friend of your current boyfriends constantly backstabbed him, and pulling his ex girlfriends. If you had known about this before getting with him, why would you make it blatantly obvious that you're talking and chillin' with him?

    What Talaniman has said is perfect.
    lovelikethis14's Avatar
    lovelikethis14 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jul 29, 2008, 07:46 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by lovelikethis14
    Hi. What should i do??? Me and my ex broke up like a month ago and there were a couple of reasons but the main reason was because of his ex friend. In march like for a week me and his friend were talking but we never did anything.But so i told my ex about it and his ex friend had did it with all of his other girlfriends as well.Also my ex's ex friend was always talking stuff about me to my ex and he would talk stuff about my ex. .So my ex broke up with me and i still love him soooooo much!!! But he told me if there was anyway or chance for us to be together i have to stop talking and everything to his ex friend.But his ex friend was my friend too. And i really want to get back with my ex so i did stop talking to him but did i make the right choice.I feel like such a bad person for doing it though.
    Thank you, you guys, it helped me make my decision, I'm not talking to the ex friend anymore.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #9

    Jul 30, 2008, 06:33 AM
    Darn! I'm happy with your decision and didn't even have to give a response lol

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