[Lostandalone]

Ive been bestfriends with her for about 6 years. We've lived together for 2. We have been friends with benefits for about 5 years. She's my life my world my everything. No one knew we were anthing more than friends it was only behind closed doors. 9 months ago or so we went to this part and she was talking to one of the girls we work with. They hit it off and started dating. This killed me because she would not date me. I was only her love in doors... this went on for a couple of months. While she was dating her she also stopped being my friend with benefits. Even though we say I love you and have a 2 bedroom apt and sleep together pretty much every night. Anyway. After a few months of them dating one night me and her went out and we had a great night.. we came back and she kissed me. One thing led to another and we were back to the way it was before and the other girl was out of the picture. I was so happy I had my love back, I felt whole again. Now all of a sudden. She starts talking to this guy... I notice me and her cooling down.. and then she tells me she has a boyfriend. Me and her are completely done. She tells me to move on.. and that she did a long time ago. And that she knew this wasn't going anywhere and she thought I did too. Ive never been so hurt in my life and I don't know what to do. I couldn't eat,I couldn't sleep - Im now on anti-depressants,sleeping medication and somehting else because I have a lot of acid in my stomach due to stress. Now I thought I could deal.. but rememeber she's my roommate.. so everythime she leaves to go out with him I watch her walk out the door. And I hear her creep in at 4am. And Im alone in my bed when she would usually be with me. Ive been getting really angry lately. Im starting to show how jealous I am and I'm being really controlling and possesive. My anger is turning to violence I would never hit her but I hit walls and knock things down and it scares her and myself. I just need help. I need someone to talk to . I feel I'm losing my mind. And Im tearing out friendship apart. Im sorry this is so long but I'm desperate.:(

[Credendovidis]

Hello Lostandalone

Desperate for what? Do you really think that you will get a miracle answer here that changes the entire situation? Forget that ! There are no miracle answers.

Although you do not say so, do I assume correctly that you are female? Actually it does not matter in this situation. Accept it : your relation with this woman is over. That's life. And the sooner you accept that, the better it is for you, and her, and all others involved.

Love sometimes hurt. And break-ups hurt even more. Specially as one side is not ready for splitting up, for accepting the situation, the reality.

You did not explain how the housing arrangements works. Who is the official owner / renter of the house / flat. If it is not you : pick up your stuff, and move out. Start all over again. Let bygones be bygones. If you are the owner / renter ask her to move out.

If you want to stay friends, give it time to heal. It won't heal if you both stay around, and you keep turning around in your feelings of hurt.

My best wishes to you.

:)

[Choux]

Dear lost,

For your own health and welfare, you have to move out and secure another living arrangement... also, new employment since she works with you.

You have learned a very difficult and heartbreaking lesson.

In the future, you have to work toward a well-balanced life... hobbies, sports, employment, friends, volunteering... you have to avoid one person being your whole emotional life.

I can't really offer you any other advice... most of us fall into suffering phases in our lives and we just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

As soon as you take action, get a new place to live, you will start getting your personal power back, take charge of your own life.

Best wishes, :)

[Witchywoman1212]

Please do your best to move out of this woman's life and move on, don't be lonely, believe me we all are and do things that is not healthy for us.
This woman does not appreciate you and was using you so time to break free,and if you need to contact her or anything feel free to pm me, I know many foks here helped me from doing things that are not in my best interest. Its painful but you'll get through it

[MaksMommy04]

I do think that it is time for you to move ahead with your life and leave this woman in your past. It seems as though you got very involved with her in many ways - and I think that you should do whatever you need to do to cut all ties with her so that it will no longer hurt you. I know it is hard and it will take him, but you deserve someone who loves you the way you love them.