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    tashie08's Avatar
    tashie08 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 22, 2008, 07:04 PM
    Feelings for close friend
    I have this close friend that I've been friends with for almost a year. I thought he was cute when I first met him but so did one of my roomates! She actually told him she like him but he never said he liked her like that. He comes to my house everyday, he even spends the night sometimes. He's seen me on my good looking days and bad we pratically do everything together. We're even alike TOO alike if you ask me. He can be arrogant at times, in front of my other guy friend, but when we would talk alone he seemed like that sensitive guy who wants to be in a good relationship. One night we talked for hours about realtionships. I would notice that he would hrow hints at me by saying certain things about taking a friendship further with a friend, and he would always tell me that and I starting thinking maybe he was talking about me but I tried to pay it no attention. He would seemed to get jealous when I talked about other guys by saying something arrogant. He always would be flirty with me like give me compliments on my hair and outfit and he always talks about my butt! Lol, but I would ignore it. One day we were alone on my couch and he laid on my lap and started to caress my knee and leg. He stopped when I didn't say anything.. I was too nervous to! He then texted me the next day and told me that if we weren't close friends that something would've already happened. Im so tempted to try something, but I don't want to mess up our friendship he's like a borther to me! And none of my roomates know including the one that used to like him. Plus, there are still so many questions unanswered! I don't know if he really likes me or just want to do a one nighter and then remain friends. Should I just remain friends with him or try to see where this might lead?

    I posted a topic about 30 minutes ago and got no answers. I am sooo desperate for answers! I've been trying to hide these feelings from my close friend for months! I know its very long to read but I had A LOT on my mind. I really need advice or I wouldn't be on here! Someone answer ASAP Thanks!
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Jun 22, 2008, 07:51 PM
    I have merged your two posts, Depending on the time of day, or even the day of the week, you may not get a answer for several hours and it will be even several days getting more answers. All the people who answer do so on their own time, when they have time to do it.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #3

    Jun 23, 2008, 01:21 AM
    This is not an uncommon question. "Do I risk my friendship for something more?"

    Well, do you? First of all, for some people "something more" simply means "we put our hands on each others private parts". I hope you two are little deeper than that!

    If you want to turn a friendship into a relationship, yeah, sure, it will include some intimacy enhancements, but mostly it's about taking your FRIENDSHIP to a deeper level. More than just sharing thoughts and hanging, you begin to counsel one another toward a mutual consensus on issues and ambitions for the two of you.

    You start to do things (not in private, in public) more and more just the two of you. You start looking for more and more things you can do FOR each other.

    You get the idea. The kissing and snuggling and potentially dangerous playing in private shouldn't be the litmus test that determines whether you two are getting closer or not.

    Oh, and the simple answer for me is "Yes, go for it." Risk it. Life is lived on the edge. You don't know you'll lose anything by trying and failing, and it's better to lose that game at bat swinging away than to have never stepped on to the field at all. Understand?
    Simple Asian's Avatar
    Simple Asian Posts: 302, Reputation: 13
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    #4

    Jun 23, 2008, 01:27 AM
    sorry i haven't been on the topic for a while... but pplz here are really nice and willingly to answer you the best they can and now here i go ^^

    He then texted me the next day and told me that if we weren't close friends that somethin would've already happened.
    isn't he already told you ? ^^... close friends are something that so hard because you always scared that if it not working out you will lose a great friend a really great one indeep

    about taking a friendship further with a friend, and he would always tell me that and I starting thinking maybe he was talking about me
    uhm, another hint ^^ >... us guys always tent to scared.. not just anything but scared to lose a girl... a girl that we like so much and also a great friend that we don't want to risk losing. We would always rather thinking stay as friends better than risking it for some stupid feeling...

    one more things i think best friends dating are the well BEST THING EVER because if you going out with some other guy ^^,, and that other guy doesn't know you as well as your best guy friend do probably won't treat you as well as your best guy friend either ^^

    THINK ABOUT IT ^^.. hope it make some sense ^^.. sorry i pretty much in the same situation... in case you the girl... i am the guy that all

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