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berttha · Jun 16, 2008, 07:57 AM

What can you do, if you have a Spiritual Leader in the Church (Female) that is very sensitive and has feelings that often get hurt.

They are contrarily also quite domineering and authoritative during sessions of fellowship and in general and can make you feel slightly intimidated in their speaking and behavior.

Although they are almost your age range and a friend at times, they often appear indifferent, which some people/friends have said is them, being 'timid' or 'meek'.

Although they manifest in Heavy prophetic anointing and display obvious leadership skills they appear to want to speak all the time and most definitely have the last word.

They want to advise, exhort, reprimand and correct others, but when you point out things that they are doing they kind of over look the matter or say a very common phrase 'IT IS WELL', but in the end appear to brush your reasonings off and continue to appear nochalent all the time as if to give the impression they are at peace with everything and everyone (this may be my own unrighteous judgement).

(example 1)
For instance if you call out their name in a rush to hurry a situation, they will draw you aside and tell you you need to be learn humility, or get upset and say 'they don't like it' when at the time you discover that they were actually offended that you were calling them loudly in the first place.

(example 2)
They explain that they are studying for Accountancy Exams and take time off Church (reasonably and you totally understand) but when you make a reference that it's a shame they missed it (out of genuine compassion), they pull you aside and tell you this is something you have been doing and as a friend they want you to stop. That they get offended and 'hurt' and that people... 'make them feel guilty' (by saying similar things).

In this incidence I told them that this was their problem and their emotional reaction and that they needed to deal with it. They said that they 'knew this would happen', (regarding my response) (AND STARTED TO WALK OFF WITHOUT ATTEMPTING TO LISTEN OR RESOLVE ANYTHING).

I stopped them. I said that they have explained that this is the way people have made them feel before. That I understand but did not mean anything bad. They reiterated that they were still in the Spirit during such meetings' as if to reassure their spirtuality.

They also kept saying that they were talking to me about this as a friend. I don't mind that bit.

My point is:

- They still didn't seem to understand that saying '... people make me feel guilty'... is impossible - but actually their choice of reaction through pride, sensitivity and immaturity. I can't blame them for that.

I know the law of love in the spirit and bearing with one another but this is frustrating, someone please advise, Spritually and with Maturity please.

Please also feel free to give me your opinion on me as well.

Thanks.

N0help4u · Jun 16, 2008, 08:25 AM

Sounds like they have what the Bible calls an unteachable spirit
Bible.org: Appendix: The Plight of Being Unteachable

Mental Attitude

Sounds like they THINK they are so spiritually mature and above others and
Therefore think they are in the position to correct others.

The only thing I know that works is avoiding getting into a conversation of any kind with them. Also when they try and correct you use short one sentence things to get them to drop it like "God will show me in his time" "Well everybody has their way of doing things and neither way is wrong'' "I already prayed and know this is what I need to do"

Sounds like they haven't got a clue on how to distinguish their way of thinking from spiritual matters.

berttha · Jun 17, 2008, 03:53 AM

Thanks for your Mental Attitude document. One of the problems I been having (and the reference to this is at the bottom of the document) is that they manifest very much in the Gifts of a Prophet.

I know that when I have my mind clogged up with people and matters it is very hard for God to use me.

The reverse is with this leader which confounds me, but shouldn't be my problem.

Also, because of the relationship and inability for me to 'get through' to her (since I joined the Church 4 years ago although I believe I have been trying) I simply just do not want to go to listen to what she has to say, or be told what to do constantly.

This may also be my contempt or despite for a Prophet which is warned against, but relationships are more important than the gifts .i.e. Love. It would be more honorable to respect her and get on with her as well.

N0help4u · Jun 17, 2008, 05:10 AM

I doubt it is your contempt or despite. The problem is with her. She thinks since she is SO spiritual it automatically makes HER judgment on things right.
There is a saying 'So heavenly minded that you are no earthly good'. Which basically means that some Christians mean well but they forget how to relate to others individually.

N0help4u · Jun 17, 2008, 12:26 PM

What I am trying to say (hopefully clarifies it even better) she did not 'die to self' but incorporated self into her 'spiritual gifts' therefore as spiritual as she comes off she is not the 'gospel truth' to follow like a sheep. The Bible says discern the spirits for this very reason.

Galveston1 · Jun 28, 2008, 12:42 PM

Does this person make the claim of being a prophet? If so, that would be a red flag to me. I know what the Holy Spirit does, and somewhat about how He moves, and one of the things that He will lead you into is the quality of humility. I know some people who are used in prophetic ministry and none of them claim to be a prophet.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 28, 2008, 06:10 PM

I will say this with some caution, personally I doubt they are having that much experience with the gift of the spirit, often controlling people will fake it, to make thierself seem or feel important, and others will do it as a control factor

A person who does not have their own personal life and their own spiritual nature in line with God's word and have their life in balance, will not be operating a lot in the Spirit.

Also if a person is a prophet it will be easy to know, first others who have the ability to desern spirits will know them easily. Also we can see if what they are saying goes along with God's word. And there is a large differnece in a prophet and someone who gets various "words" from God from time to time. Prophets will have a word that will help and build up someone or the church.

I know people who have dreams that come true to a point, one saved my life when I was warned a certain person at a certain address would have a weapon under the cushion of a chair. A real prophet will have very exact information. But all of them will be humble and almost none of them claim they are a phophet, most may admit they get a word from God

If your group speaks in tounges, does the same person always interpert ? I ask since I work in the spirit a lot, and I will say that amost 1/3 of all of the ones I hear I will say I am fairly sure are not done properly. People for some reason feel obligated to give a meaning to something said, even if they are not feeling it for real.

westnlas · Jun 28, 2008, 06:19 PM

I think you might pay a bit more attention to God, than the people you meet in church. Unfortunately, every church membership has members who behave in ways the rest of us find questionable. The point of going to church is to bring oneself closer to God, not members of the choir. Each of us finds God in our own way. One way should never be thought less pious than another (within the limits of the commandments or basic teachings of non-Christians). Her actions aren't worth the time taken to fret over. Smile, be polite and nice. Let it go.