[txmix24]

My husband and myself have been married since March 06. We had a very rough start to a relationship in 05. Got together in March 05, broke up May 05, found out I was pregnant in July 05, and got back together in Aug 05. Had our son Jan 06, and married March 06. From the beginning he has had insecurities of cheating and what not. We bounced between houses for a few months and I have been going to college since he met me finishing dual associates degrees. Jan of last year I told him I wanted a divorce. When we finally got our own place, I felt as though I was there to take care of our son, house, meals, etc... all he had to do was go to work and come home and he still B****** about that. Since our son was born he hasn't had anything to do with him up until now because he's two and actually has a personality. When we had our place he would also not be intimate with me and blamed it on stress etc. He went back into military and got deployed June 06 but before he left for training and stuff in May 06 he quit his job a month too early, sat on his butt at home and did nothing but drink every night until odd hours of the morning and then yell at our son when he woke up early because he wanted to sleep in from staying up all night on the computer and drinking. I have told him I don't know if I married him because more of the reason of our son or love. I told him before he came home on leave I was tired of fighting. He hasn't respected any of my decisions on sexual things via internet, webcam, etc... He argues and says I should be like the other wives and g/fs and not who I am. And he's accused me of cheating three times since he's been gone even though I have had the option to I didn't. He came home on leave and he drink the whole time he was home. I have realized we are better parents being apart and just being friends and we are both happier that way then together but I can't get him to let go. He says I will change etc... but every time he changes he blames it on me and throws it into my face every fight which is all the time. We fight about 98% of the time we talk. I think it would be healthier for both of us to end the marriage and just be friends for the sake of our son and our sanity but he won't let go. He says he wants to go to counseling etc but he's already admitted that Im the problem. The only problem with me is Im hard headed, stubborn, and have set goals that I had set before I met him and was working towards them. He gave up everything and changed "because of me". And now that his parents know Im serious about the divorce his dad and grandparents are accusing me of stealing social security checks and paychecks from them. I made a mistake on change of address and tried to fix it but still got some of there mail so I forwarded it to them. They haven't said anything to me but have to him. His mom agrees and says she understands what I mean about being better apart then together and happier. How can I get him to understand that and let go? I think he's afraid of being alone. When we broke up in May he jumped right into another relationship, he said I love you to me a week after he met me while he was drunk for the first time. How do I get him to move on? I can't handle the mental and emotional abuse that we go through every time we talk, and I can't handle things being thrown in my face that I never made him do.

[talaniman]

You must leave, and let him figure it out for himself. Plain and simple, so stop worrying about him, and do what you have to, for you.