[smith1012]

Hey,

Okay one of buddies told me to come to this huge party at this club. Huge meaning like hundreds of people (19-22 years). Some I know(not very comfortable with them) and others I don't.

I want to go and have fun but I'm getting nervous thinking about my social skills and how I'm going to act. I'm shy and not the type to go up to people and talk. When I talk to someone and they think I'm weird, I start thinking more negatively than I already am.

I always want them to come to me and if I just stand there at the club quiet, I'm scared that many are going to start making fun of me. Men are men right. But I act like a girl and I admit it.

I have this type of issue a lot where I'm in a group and hardly say a word because I'm worried my voice sounds weird or what I say is just retarded and just doesn't come out right because when I'm nervous I sort of stutter. What should I do? Should I just say I'm not coming because I don't want to be depressed after the party. If I do go I plan of drinking a little bit of alcohol (not abuse it) alone before I attend the party so I can be relaxed.

Thanks for any advice in advance :)

[interinfinity]

wow kind of weird because I'm the same as you. I have found for me, that I just end up going, and I have fun sitting by myself just smoking cigarettes and talking to one or 2 other random people. I would say, go. Just because there are 100 or more people, doesn't mean it would be any worse than 5 or 10 people. In a huge group like that, hardly anyone would be able to notice you anyway. Id actually like to know your age, and your gender so I could maybe help you out more. For me, I'm a 27 year old, and I haven't felt the way you described since I was in my teens. I also think it would be easier for a girl to have fun at a party like that, although maybe I'm being a bit sexist in thinking that.

[smith1012]

I'm male and 19 years old. Thing is I want to make friends but get nervous thinking about it too much. Basically if I have a goal that puts me in front of people and start thinking about it too much, I get anxious and negative about things. What I learned from alcohol was whenver I tried thinking negative, my mind would say 'that's nonsense, why care," SO easily!

[smith1012]

It's funny though I'm uncomfortable hanging with people I know. I guess it's because I don't go out as much so I'm not too used to social life. I get happy when people like me but very depressed when I think they don't even if it were just one person. I never ever had the feelling of 'never mind style' when it comes people and I envy that. If I had a lot of friends I guess id have that feeling but I'm not in luck.