[logan2007]

My boyfriend and I recently broke up. He said he needed space because he no longer could handle the jealousy. I can not ocntrol it, when I try it gets harder. Every time he talks to a girl I become jealous and angry. I feel threatened that the girl will take him away from me. In my past relationships it was always broken because of another girl. THey were unfaithful, dishonest and immature. I now found a wonderful angel, that has given me so much; love, honesty, support, trust, loyalty and guidance. But my jealousy got involved. I want my past out of my present life, because it has ruined a reltionship that was good. I feel terrible for putting him through stress, when all he has given my was respect, patience and support. BUt someone can only take so much. I need advice on how to forgive and forget about my past. I can no longer live like this and no longer want to feel threatened by other girls when I am in a relationship. IT was not fiar to him and not fair to me. WHat do I do?

[Chery]

Jealousy is a trait that most insecure individuals develop. So, what you need to do is find out why you are so insecure about yourself in the first place. I would suggest therapy to help you get to know yourself better. Maybe you had a bad experience in the past and cannot let go, no matter for what reason, but it will have to come out and be worked on before it takes complete control and not let you develop your self-respect and security in who you are.

All individuals are jealous to a point, but keeping it under control is the hard part. Just keep telling yourself that jealousy is a killer of any relationship and work on it as soon as you can. Join a group of people with the same problems or talk to a school counselor, a telephone help-line,. anything that will help you bring out the negative problem and work on it. Something in your past has gotten you to mistrust people, you'll need to find out how and why...

Good luck dear, and keep us posted.

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