[ariessun1968]

I have been dating a guy for 2 1/2 years. We worked together for 5 years prior to dating.. although not closely. We have said "i love you's", exchanged tokens of affections, etc, etc. We do talk about maririage, although neither of us stresses because we have both been married before and are now divorced with kids. My issue is that he has communication with his ex-girlfriend, with his ex-secretary (who now works for me) and who knows what other women. Once he flirted inapproriately with my personal sectetary until I asked him to stop. By inappropriate communication.. I mean texting or paging to say "wow, you look nice today" or "if I"m bad will you give me a spanking" or just constanct everyday communication which I thought was reserved for the 2 of us. He used to page me every morning and say "good morning beautiful", but he doesn't really do it anymore unless I bring it up..then its not really worth it. I keep telling myself "I can do better". I do love him and I have really shown him especially in the past couple of months (he had a bad accident) and I took off work to take care of him). I don't like feeling that I am in a relationship with him and 2 or 3 other women... including his ex (which doesn't like me) who I haven't mentioned yet. I probably didn't mention that we are an interracial relationship either. We are both successful... I am younger, but very set in my career and well respected. He is also well respected, but I'm not sure if it is as much as I am which is what causes some of our issues at times (I think). I have spoken with him about his behavior in the past and he has stopped, but then I find something (yes I snoop at times) and the issue comes up again.. only with someeone new. He is affectionate and caring and does anything for me, but I think it is disrespectful to send flrtatious, sexy communications to other women. Any thoughts would help.

[misterk]

Ditch him.

[ariessun1968]

Thank you. I am working on it. We have broken up so many times.. and we both keep coming back. We have 3 kids between the 2 of us.. they adore each other... it will be hardest on them (he has 2) and (I have 1). We also work together and everyone knows how we feel and have been asking us about marriage.

[kaj675]

I think if you love each other enough love will conquer all. I'm in the same situation. My boyfriend's ex even calls our house phone asking to speak to him, I just laugh at her and hang up because I know that irritates her. She's even had the nerve to stop and see his kids playing outside and try to get them to get in the car with her. She is pure evil. I say fight for what you believe in your heart.