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amansfield · Sep 26, 2007, 07:22 AM

I have a 2yr old baby girl. Her father hasn't seen her since she was 7 months old. He wasn't around when I was pregnant because he didn't believe that she was his. I didn't put his name on the birth certificate because I told him he had to prove he was a good father first. Obviously that hasn't happened. I haven't asked for child support nor do I care if I get it or not. I want to ask him to sign his rights over but I have a feeling he's not going to cooperate and decide all of a sudden he wants to be in her life. If I ask him to sign his rights over and he decides he doesn't want to then I would like to file for child support. So I guess my questions are: If he hasn't seen her since she was 7 months old does he have any rights to her and does he automatically have to sign them over?
If he does decide to see her then does he have to pay back child support?
What do I do if he tries to get full custody of her? He lives on his own and works; I live with my parents for now but I work and she is well taken care of. So would he have that chance of taking her from me?

ScottGem · Sep 26, 2007, 07:27 AM

First, its not as simple as signing a paper. It has to be approved by a family court and that's unlikely to happen. Generally a bio parent is only allowed to relinquish rights if there is someone waiting to adopt.

Second child support and parental rights are different things. Whether he has to pay child support is a matter for the courts to decide. If you find you need public assistance, they will insist on going after him for support.

Since he doesn't seem inclined to be a part of the baby's life then why not leave well enough alone?

amansfield · Sep 26, 2007, 07:39 AM

Originally Posted by amansfield

I have a 2yr old baby girl. Her father hasn't seen her since she was 7 mths old. He wasn't around when I was pregnant because he didn't believe that she was his. I didn't put his name on the birth certificate because I told him he had to prove he was a good father first. Obviously that hasn't happened. I haven't asked for child support nor do I care if I get it or not. I want to ask him to sign his rights over but I have a feeling he's not going to cooperate and decide all of a sudden he wants to be in her life. If I ask him to sign his rights over and he decides he doesn't want to then I would like to file for child support. So I guess my questions are: If he hasn't seen her since she was 7 mths old does he have any rights to her and does he automatically have to sign them over?
If he does decide to see her then does he have to pay back child support?
What do I do if he tries to get full custody of her? He lives on his own and works; I live with my parents for now but I work and she is well taken care of. So would he have that chance of taking her from me?

I do want to leave well enough alone... believe me I do. I just worry that in the future he has this awakening and decides he wants to be in her life then it just confuses her. I would like to just nip that in the bud before it happens...

ScottGem · Sep 26, 2007, 07:45 AM

That is being unfair to him AND her. You need to prepare her that she has a father who currently is too immature to be a father to her. That someday he may mature enough to want to be a part of her life. Impress upon her that it is not her fault but his.

amansfield · Sep 26, 2007, 07:51 AM

Well, I guess I will just leave well enough alone and whatever happens, happens. I will make sure that she knows that it isn't her fault and go from there. Thank you for all your help.