[winp]

We fell in love the first night we met.Unfortunate for me he had a girlfriend. He left her for me. Then I found out he was going back and forth with us. He said he wouldn't talk to her if I took him back.then around x max he told me he was confused and needed time to think.After x mas he told me he was with her during our break and slept with her and realized he loved me. Couple months later he asked me to marry him. So we got married and I went throughout his e mail etc. and found a letter stating he misses her and looks at her Facebook from time to time, also that before we broke up during x mas he slept with her. Why did he ask me to marry him if he keeps going back to her, and why is he lying to me when I confront him. Is it possible he even loves me

[Gregisteredtrademark]

I can say I love you too, but does that mean anything? Actions do in fact speak louder than words. Being someone who has been on the other side of this tale, you are his comfort zone. You have accepted his actions in the past and by doing so in his mind justified them. Sorry to be so blunt, but are you living up to expectation in the bedroom? Do you talk about it? What will make him happy? But also what makes you happy? It's a two sided coin.

You need to confront him with proof and make him decide. Chances are though, if he chooses you. She will be in the mix somewhere in the future.

[nicespringgirl]

He made his marriage decision without responsibility!
You need to reconsider your marriage with him, he is nothing but a loser. A cheater, and a confused cheater!
You deserve a better man!
A guy can say "I love you!" not mean it... be careful about his lies!

[talaniman]

Given his history, why would you marry him?? Given his actions, why are you staying?? Did you really think he would change?? Either stay, and live with this cheater, or go, and find a better man to share your life with.

[margarita_momma]

You have no one to blame for the situation you are in but yourself. The guy was cheating on you before you married him and he is apparently continuing to cheat on you while married. By you forgiving him time after time for his past flings with this other girl, in his mind he is probably seeing it as you are okay with it. He knows that you may get mad for a little while but all he has to do is cry, apologize, and say that he loves you and all is well again. If your question is does he even love me, then the answer is no. If he loved you, he would be faithful to you and the vows you both took.

[kp2171]

You fell in love the first time you met... right...

The fact that you STILL believe it was love is just amazing.

He had played you, and you have played the victim. Until you expect more for and from yourself, you are just going to be his convenient lay, fix, whatever.

Its BORING to hear "how did i get here?" when most know how. You liked him, you liked the idea of him liking you, and that false security sucked you in.

Its OK. I've been there. Done that. Been the fool by my own choice and doing. Until I realized she wasn't screwing up my life, I was.

So... now what?

Well... its time to demand more for AND from yourself. Unless you do that, well... there's just no progress to be made.

Its OK. Most of us, at some point, get "fooled"... partly by the other person and partly by ourselves. Welcome to the group.

Now you need to figure out how much you want your life to be good versus how much you are willing to put up with his sh!t for a false sense of security.

[lopezyes]

Well I Think U Should Leave Him A Cheater Is Always Going to Be A Cheater They'll Never Change.

[JoeCanada76]

I also feel that it is best to leave him. He has proven to you that he is not able to stay committed. That is what marriage is. Commitement to each other only.

Hope you know the answer and actually make the decisions to make your life better without him.

Good luck.

Joe