[RealDeal1970]

Let me chime in on this one: I did send this private to another, but I'm getting use to spilling the guts on the forum now I guess... lol

I meet this girl a couple of months ago, and I was not looking for any relationship or anything. We finally go out after several emails and phone conversations.

As far as first dates go... really great time and it seemed she had more of the midwest values that I grew up with (hope that's not tooo stereotypical) but I am a pretty nice guy. In other words, no game playing, no wait three days before I call you back... that type of thing.

Anyway, because of the holiday vacations over Christmas and new years, we spend a lot of time together. I even said about two weeks ago " I think we are spending too much time together", and she was like "no, why do you saythat, I like it when your here"

Now, the screwy part. My house is about 60 miles from hers and I work nights. However, my work is about 7 miles from her home, so she offered for me to stay there. In almost feeling like I had to do something for her letting me stay there, I'd put together candlelight dinners and bubblebaths and stuff like that when she arrived home... she loved it... BUT

She get's home Wed. evening - and out of the blue says "are we living together or something?" This of course is after the day before asking me to go to Costco with her on Wed night, and moving some furniture to storage on Thursday (Like I would be around)

I try to explain that NO, I'm not living here I thought you wanted my help this week, and you always say " I love it when your here" She basically said she was sooo stressed out with work and needed to get things done and she didn't need anymore stress (ME) in her life as she feels obligated to spend her time with me if I'm there. I was already heading for the door but then to add to it, she asked for her key back as well... that seemed a little more extreme to me.

Question: Why don't I just be a player as I'm pretty good at it, even at 35... why do I think someone might be different and real? I truly thought she wanted my help, and although I did feel I gave 110%, I realized that she's not used to being treated all that well and maybe couldn't geton board with it, or maybe didn't want to...

I left the key and said bye... that was three days ago... now what? Move on?

[CaptainForest]

You work nights, so you were staying there. Isn't that kind of like living there?

So she freaked out? Perhaps you just need to take it a bit slower with her. Give her a call and talk to her about this. Nothing will be resolved until you 2 talk about what each one of you wants and expects.

[talaniman]

First my apologies It wasn't my intentions to seem like I was jumping on your case.I should have told you that to get better responses you needed to start a new thread,sorry!As to your problem it seems that things may have moved a little to fast for your lady friend so after 3 days a phone call just to see how she is would I think be appropriate.Maybe an invitation to hang out or dinner with no strings attached,just to get to know her better.There is no hurry,you can express interest without pressing her,just see what she says and go with the flow.:cool: 10 points for the no mind games attitude!:D

[blueiman]

I don't know about this one. Hummmmmm thinking. Hmmmm I got it. She said basically to get out you are living her. Women want one thing then change there mind. Typical. I mean not all women. Would not harm to have one more talk, yes. Bottom line tell her you want to take a break because you're her boyfriend not her little helper. Catch my drift. I have had women say, can you fix my car brakes. I'm like no I'm your boyfriend not your machanic. Da. She sounds like too much trouble. Let her go. Sh^t now I'm changing my mind.

[RealDeal1970]

That's great... :) Changing on the fly... thank you, I appreciate that... of course then you get the " well, I never asked you to make me diiner, or do the laundry, or fix the garage door... blah... blah

[blueiman]

That's great... :) Changing on the fly... thank you, I appreciate that....of course then you get the " well, I never asked you to make me diiner, or do the laundry, or fix the garage door...blah...blah

A good girl would tell you not to help her. She would be like take me out somewhere and spend some money on me. But, if you're living with her sounds like you were. So, doing all that stuff around the house was the right thing to do. But, if I was not living there then forget the help stuff. Because I got sh$t to do at my home. See.